Running Towards Him

Intentional Simplified Goals for 2012

2012-01-26T14:40:00.000-08:00

Over the last few years, I have come to understand that beginning the New Year with aggressive goals while wonderful in concept, typically fall by the wayside just as soon as I commit to them. As a result of this, I have adopted the "soft start" approach to my goals.
By this, I mean, that I begin the year with what I think will work out for me, tweaking as I go through January, and implementing full force by Feb 1st. This takes the "pressure" off of me to accomplish things at one of the busiest times of the year when my schedule is stretched to the limit already and my routine is typically off-kilter at best.
This year, I have had the added blessing of awaiting the arrival of my new grandson! He arrived just over a week ago and now that he has come, I can begin to get back to my "routines". I am currently in the weeks before Rocky, coming away from a bit of a knee injury, and battling a bit of a cold, something I always seem to get the week before Rocky.
I plan to run the race with a modified time goal which will better reflect the level of fitness I feel I am at right now.
Below I have listed my fitness goals for the year. They are very realistic, some might feel even a bit too lax, but for me, I need to see progress rather than always coming up short in the ability to reach my set goals. If I surpass these goals, then all the better. What I am aiming for is Intentional Training. Whatever training I do take on should serve a purpose whether it is to relax, to strengthen, or to increase endurance, speed, etc. I don't want to exercise without a purpose, just to say I did something.

Strengthening: 2 work outs/week, allowing for recovery and illness, 80-90 workouts
Can include, push ups, abs, weights
Swimming: 2 work outs/week, allowing for recovery and illness, 75 - 80 work outs
Runs in miles: 1500 miles
Yoga/stretching: 45 workouts
Volunteer: 2 events

I have a few other mini-goals that I plan to fit in along the way, but nothing that I would be too upset about if I didn't achieve them in 2012.

As far as races go, I plan to stick to shorter distance training, meaning no 100's for 2012. I suppose this may also mean no 100 at Rocky 2013 for that would require training for it in 2012. My body needs a bit of a rest from the constant long runs.
I want a shot at some of the races I have not done so well in over the past two years. Mostly the Capt'n Karl's series. I plan to make Cactus Rose and Bandera my main races for the year.

On the personal side of things, I have established a few new parameters through which everything else will need to pass through. I have decisions to make about what to hang on to and what to let go of. There will be a lot of letting go, but in the end, saying "No" to those things will allow me to say a deeper "Yes" to the things that are most important to me.
Reaching this point in my journey has taken several years, hours of journaling, and tons of reflection and prayer. I have already began to cut many things from my daily life. One of those "things" was Facebook. I know I have done this before and I have always returned to it out of fear that I was missing something. This time, it feels different. I have a sense of freedom that I didn't even realize that I had given up while caught up in all that FB is. What I have found most interesting is that of all the "friends" that I had on FB, less than 5 have made an attempt to talk to me since leaving it in December. I am done with relationships that are convenient and I am choosing to be intentional in real life friendships. Let's sit down and have a coffee and a chat, the old-fashioned way.

We also made the decision to give up all the cable channels that seemed I was blocking anyway for the sake of the children. I didn't think it would be a big deal to me, but I have discovered that I apparently was quite fond of certain shows that I really miss. We also, in giving up the extra channels, lost our ability to DVR some of our favorite shows. This was difficult to get used to, but now, several weeks into our letting go of it all, we are all seeing the effects of less TV around here.

More reading is getting done. There are toys everywhere. There are puzzles being built most every day. My laundry is folded and put away. And we aren't as tired from staying up to late. Our TV and Netflix watching has become intentional. In other words, we sit down to watch something because we really want to see it, rather than previously when we just plopped down in front of the thing and got sucked in.
Network TV is horrible at best and since that is all we get now, I find that I can hardly even tolerate the TV being on.

I have been reading some great books, taking notes, and jotting down ideas for my own writing at some point down the road. I think I can honestly say, I feel as though I have been lifted out of a self-imposed fog as I come away from the influence of FB and TV. Admittedly, it was hard at first, but things are fitting together nicely now.

Over Christmas, I was discerning what I would need to strip away from my life and I realized that it was going to be quite difficult. I love most everything I do. My problem lies in the continuum of time. There are only 24 hours in a day and I can not possibly do all that I "want" to do in that time, at least I can not do it joyfully. I do not want my children to recall me as a woman who seemed to always appear stressed out or angry. And if I am really enjoying everything I am doing, why do I come across as stressed and angry? Most probably, for me, it is because I am not doing these things for the right reason. Yet, I hated the thought of saying "no" to so much.
As I snuggled on the couch with Boo, it hit me. I needed to stop thinking of all of this as saying "no". I needed to think of it differently. "What am I saying YES to?" I am saying YES to God. YES to my husband. YES to my children and grandchildren. YES to my health. YES to our financial peace. If I can keep my focus on these YESes, then all the rest of the world will be just fine. So herein lies my filter. If I consider doing anything, it must fall into one of the 5 YESes I have identified as the MOST important ones to me. This helps to relieve me of the usual guilt I feel, which in the past has always been a big motivator for me, guilt. Such a dirty word, such a useless emotion most of the time.

I am enjoying intentional simplified living, filled with an internal peace and sense of joy that I have only begun to feel the effects of. I challenge you to jump in too. Identify the five most important things in your life that you desire to say "Yes" to and then strive to develop that deeper "Yes". Put them on a note card and look at them everyday. Remind yourself that you are not saying "no" to things, rather, you are saying "yes" to the most important things. And know that you are not alone in your efforts!

Welcome Jacob Sky!

2012-01-24T19:38:00.001-08:00

The Classroom of Silence

2012-01-16T17:30:00.000-08:00

On retreat with my confirmation teens this weekend, a message came through loud and clear. It is a message that I have been hearing here and there over the last several weeks and Saturday, I finally heard it in a way that I had not really heard it before. I need to spend more time in the Classroom of Silence.

Matthew Kelly talks about the Classroom of Silence is most every book he writes. He describes how important this aspect of our faith life and our prayer time is. Our retreat speaker, Mike Gormley, also discussed how important silence within our prayer life is. He states that "for prayer to be effective, we need 3 things... Solitude, Stillness, and Silence.

This seemed an odd combinations of "S"'s to me. It seems only logical that if you have Solitude and Stillness, Silence would surely exist. And then I went to Mass and heard the readings. The one I most needed to hear.

the LORD came and stood there, calling out as before: Samuel, Samuel! Samuel answered, “Speak, for your servant is listening.” 1 Samuel 3:10

This passage stirred something within me and then Father, during his homily, said, "This reading reminds us to listen to God. We have turned the verse around and we say "Listen Lord, for your servant is speaking!""

Of course. I recalled all the times I must have sat in prayer and poured out my heart, my troubles, my worries, my concerns, my failures, my successes, my gratitude, and so on to the Lord. And how often I have not listened to what He had to say. How difficult this is...to sit in silence...to wait to hear His voice.

But as all things, this requires practice. As my running requires a training plan, so does my faith life. If I can dedicate many hours a week to my physical formation, can I not also commit some time to the practice of silence?

We all want to learn and we all need teachers. God is the ultimate teacher, the supreme mentor. When I want to learn something, I learn it best when I am taught by someone who truly knows the subject at hand. A teacher enters a classroom to teach, (which usually involves speaking) and a student enters a classroom to learn, (which usually involves silence). At times the student may ask a question for further clarification, but as a rule, the teacher has the floor. Who better to teach me how to pray and how to live than the Great Teacher Himself.

Off to school...

Shoe Review - Brooks PureProject Flow

2012-01-10T15:44:00.000-08:00

After acquiring a pair of Brooks PureGrit back in October, (you can read my review here) I knew I had to buy a pair of Brooks PureFlow as soon as I could manage to.

Christmas provided an opportunity for my husband to gift a pair to me along with some new Injinji socks. First, about Injinji... I love these socks. I have been wearing them for almost 4 years so when I saw these fun, striped colors, I was so excited to put them on! They really are like wearing a party on your feet! If you have any problems with toe blisters or toe nails rubbing against other toes, these really do solve the problem. The only time I can not wear these socks is when it is very cold out. The separated toes don't have the ability to stay warm and I need warm feet to be a happy trail runner.

The PureFlows fit just as great as the Grits. Like they were made for my fit specifically. It must have something to do with the elastic band across the top of the shoe which holds the upper nice and snug to my foot.

The cushioning is sufficient for me. I like cushioning, so having a much lighter shoe without sacrificing the comfort factor is a definite plus. I have yet to run past 12 miles in the shoes as I am still transitioning into the lower heel. I hope over the next several months to be in these shoes almost exclusively.

I can't really find anything I don't like about this shoe. Thank you, Brooks for a nice shoe, at a great price!

New Year, New Goals

2012-01-06T14:20:00.000-08:00

I am currently 4 weeks out from Rocky and in the thick of high mileage. The homefront is very busy with Bean home from her semester abroad till next weekend, Alicia expecting our grandson any minute now, Confirmation and ACTS retreat preparations, and laundry. It seems there is always laundry to do.

I am no longer on FB and feel better already. I miss keeping up with people, but the drama factor is way down and I am seeing positive benefits by focusing on things directly in front of me. You can keep up with my training, if you are so inclined, at Daily Mile. There is a widget on the right-hand side of this blog. If you click on it, you will arrive at my DM page.

I have been able to take the time to write out my plan for 2012 on paper, but I have not yet had time to compose a respectable blog post to share. I hope to get to it soon, but my grandbaby may get here first!

Happy New Year to all!

Merry Christmas 2011!

2011-12-25T14:01:00.000-08:00

For unto us a child is born!

Wishing each of you the peace and joy of the season and praying you feel the blessings overflow into 2012!

WOOOOOOOOOSHHHHHHHHH!

2011-12-23T17:17:00.000-08:00

Did you see that? It just flew by! December that is! As well as 2011! OK, enough with the !!!!!!..!

It's been a busy Advent around the home front. I finally finished up the Christmas preparations today and am looking forward to sliding into my favorite time of the year...the week AFTER Christmas. That week when no one is expected to really do much except be lazy, enjoy family, and drink and eat about anything one would like.

I have finally figured out that "treat weeks" (weeks where I don't worry about what I eat as a sort of reward to myself) are not really reward weeks. They are more apt to wreak havoc on my intestinal track which in turns causes "CODE BROWN" to show up at the very worst times while on my runs. Or in the pool. It just isn't worth it anymore and I am giving up "treat weeks". I'm sticking to the plan that works day in and day out, just throw an extra side of Hummus on my plate! (oops, another ! snuck in).

Jamoosh over at Last Mile Lounge is hosting the Hard Core Club for 2012. You can bet I am in. This is the one area I have yet to really get the results I seek because, well, I stink at following through with consistent core work. Funny how that works.

I have a few thoughts about my direction for 2012, not just running, but over all. I will take some time next week to compile them together for your reading pleasure. Key word for the year? Simplicity.

Wishing all of you a Very Merry Christmas and a Blessed and Peaceful New Year!

Texas Trails 50K

2011-12-06T09:19:00.001-08:00

Friday afternoon turned to Friday evening and I realized I hadn't thought much about the 50K I was scheduled to run on Saturday morning. I found it funny that I wasn't nervous, worried, or concerned so much about all the little things that I normally obsess about.

By 10:30 pm, I had a small bag packed, a towel, an extra pair of shoes, socks, and a small med kit. Save for the shoes and towel, everything could have fit into a gallon size ziplock bag with room to spare. In the past, I have had so much more with me and it has become somewhat of an art form of sorts to show up at a race with as little as possible.

Typically, I use my hydration vest, but lately, I've been using my hand-helds for most all of my running. This day I stuck with the hand-held and it worked perfectly. I make good use of my Spi belt making sure I carry my nutrition and electrolytes necessary for each loop. My drop bag has what I will use to replenish the Spi belt for each subsequent loop.

Saturday, my nutrition consisted of honey chews, S-caps, water, a few raisins and chips from aid stations. I took the S-caps on the :48 and ate on the :58, as I stuck with my typical 8/2 plan for a majority of the race.

I had a bit of a horrible morning beginning at 4:35 am. I was awoken by the vicious sound of attacking dogs. This was coupled with the sound of a cat screaming as well. I jumped out of bed and glanced out the window to see two unknown dogs tearing apart my neighbor's cat. I ran as fast as I could down the stairs and scared the dogs off, but I really wish I could have caught them. I am a dog lover and would never want any harm to come to one, but these dogs were on the loose and out to kill. They need to be caught, and the owners need to be held responsible for their dogs being out.

I made my way over to Pumpkin, a ragdoll breed cat. The most beautiful cat I have ever seen. He has adopted my front porch and sometimes my garage as his second home with another neighborhood cat, Harley. He was still alive, but in horrible pain and shock. I didn't dare touch him as I wasn't sure how he would react. I talked quietly to him and tried to soothe him with my voice. It wasn't doing much good. He didn't appear to be able to move. I had to figure out what to do. I thought perhaps my race would be out the window.

I decided to go to the neighbor's house to see if there happened to be a light on. 4:35 in the morning, no such luck. I went back to Pumpkin and he was gone! I couldn't believe it! I know that he was not capable of moving, so how he got away, I have no idea. I knew he could not have gone far. I looked under my Suburban and saw him in the same state. Panting, crying, miserable. My heart was breaking into a million pieces for him.

There was no way I could start my car with him underneath it, so I laid a towel to the side of my car, opened the garage door, thinking perhaps he would try to make his way in there to hide. I went back into the house to get a few things and as I came back outside, I heard a meow like I have never heard before. It was a "Please don't leave me!" type of meow. He was looking straight at me as he had again somehow managed to get partially out from under the car. I went to him and pet him awhile. He was a bit calmer and let me pet him. But he was in horrible agony. I slowly moved him onto the towel and carefully wrapped his beautiful body into the towel. He allowed me to pick him up and I just talked to him. I told him how beautiful he was and how strong. I told him I wouldn't let anything bad happen to him. And I just held him for a minute. I made my way back to the neighbor's home and rang the bell. By now it was a bit after 5, and as she told me later, she knew it couldn't be anything good.

As she opened the door, I had tears on my face and I handed her Pumpkin telling her all the story. She was calm and mentioned that she had been through this before and would know what to do. I let Pumpkin go and I knew I wouldn't see him again.

I knew if I thought about things much longer, I would bail on the race, so I got into the car and started driving. That meow haunted me the entire way to the park.

As I pulled in, I saw Richard, parked, and we walked in to get our race packets. I also saw Evan and Tessie (sweet, sweet dog!). Tessie brightens anyone's day! Evan took a picture of us visiting and while it's not the best one of me, she is adorable!

The start line was a nice place to catch up with a few faces I have not seen in some time. The 50K had just over 110 entrants, so it was not too crowded. I'm not sure how many showed up for the 20K, but that crowd seemed larger. Again, Evan was kind enough to snap a picture of some of the local runners that were ready to run.

It was a bit chilly waiting for the start, so I kept my jacket until the last minute. Richard was kind enough to tuck it away as he waited for the start of the 20K.

I saw Rachel, who was running her first ultra, at the start. She ended up having a great race and every time I saw her on the course, she looked happy and strong. Sara was also at the start and I quickly thought back to the fun times we had "lost in The Woodlands" with Pat!

The first loop was a 10 K, and I wore my Pure Grits for this aspect of the race. Almost immediately I recognized a bit of wonky-ness in my right achilles. I was glad I brought the spare shoes, my Cascadias. I came in at 1:10, about an 11:25 pace. I changed my shoes and headed out for the first 20K loop. It was very pleasant weather and there was a lot of opportunity to see the same faces on the out and backs. I love being able to say hello and encourage everyone I can. It makes for a great day!

The loop was fairly uneventful with the exception of the 4 bathroom stops I had to make. I have no idea why this was such an issue this day, but it was what it was. I finished the 2nd loop at the 3:32 mark for a pace of 11:37. Richard hung around for a bit to see me come in and cheer me out on the last loop.

Talking with Richard for a moment, I downed my coconut water and ate a few Chocolate Cranberry Craisins (TO DIE FOR!!!!!!) I bid my farewell and headed back out to finish up the last 20K. About a mile from the aid station, I realized that I had forgotten to refill my Spi Belt with my supply of Honey Stingers. I had one package left, so I calculated that if I ate every 5 miles, I would be good to go. I continued to hydrate and take the S caps, focused on keeping a consistent pace, and ran the trail truly knowing it. I knew where the hills were, and saved my walk times for then. My mantra for the race was to run slow, stay consistent, and the real race for me would begin at the last aid station.

I had a few time goals for this race. I ran this race at a 6:22 last year. My PR for the 50K distance was 6:14. For some reason I had remembered my PR incorrectly and thought it was 6:04, so I was eager to break 6 hours. I was really praying I could come in at a 5:59. On Friday night, I looked over my prior times and discovered that my true PR wasn't a 6:04, but a 6:14. I would be lying if I didn't admit that this played with my head quite a bit during the race. I kept the mind games in check the best I could and just focused on enjoying the run.

Heading out the last loop, I knew I had run the first 20K in 2:22, so a 2:30 would be a good final loop. I kept running numbers in my head. I had to let all the "figuring" go and just run my plan, only making the decision on my true goal 2.7 miles from the finish line.

The loop again, was fairly uneventful. Still lots of smiles and hellos to be offered and received. Focusing on remaining consistent and not running my butt off just yet was difficult, however, it was a great exercise in patience for me.

As I ran past Lake Raven, I could feel the mental drama play out, but I held it at bay a little longer. I arrived at the final aid station and surmised that I had 15 minutes to run the final 2.7 in and beat my PR. I really didn't think I was going to be able to do it.

I walked out of the aid station, walked up the elevation and then began to run a fairly hard pace. I knew I couldn't open up completely just yet, so I refrained from an all out sprint. I felt strong, though tired, but I pressed on. The hardest thing was passing by Ken and Edwin and not being able to stop long enough to give them each a hug. I have never done that before. I yelled out that I was trying to break my PR and prayed that they would forgive me.

As I got to the final stretch along Park Road, I became faster and faster, keeping my turnover directly under my hips as I have been practicing on my training runs. The quicker my pace became, the better I felt. It was surreal. I didn't believe I would break 6 hours, but I knew I would have a new PR.

Seeing the concrete pathway which heads towards the finish line, I dropped the hammer and ran through the finish line at 5:54:54! A better-than-I-thought-I-ever-could have PR! I also later learned that I was the 11th female and 27th over all. There are no recognitions for age group, so I am not sure where I fell in that category. Roger Soler was at the finish to hand out medals and sweatshirts and I hugged him as hard as I could. I am sure he appreciated the sweaty love fest I left all over him!

All in all, it was a another great day to run and an awesome way to end my 2011 racing season. Looking forward to new adventures in 2012!

Just Because I Can

2011-12-02T11:19:00.001-08:00

Doesn't mean I should.

Cryptic, eh? I have been focusing on new goals for the upcoming year and my reasons for them. After PH100, I had some pretty dark moments of anger and resentment that I have had work through.

First, I was very angry at the RD of PH100. I felt misled, misguided, and then in the end after reading many of his posts and comments about the race, I felt as though he was laughing at those of us who felt the race was not as advertised. I have spoken to a few close friends about this situation and while most people would blow it off and never look back, I am a firm believer in finding the lesson in everything that I go through.

Yes, I do believe he misled the runners, yes, he did advertise a fairly flat, fast course when in fact it wasn't one. Yes he did make jokes about the folks who complained, and in the end, he even ran the course himself to "prove" how easy it was. Slap me in the face. He finished the course in 31 hours, 1 hour over the time limit allowed to the rest of the runners and then gave himself a belt buckle. Speaks to his character I suppose.

Ultimately, the lesson can not be about him, however. It must come back to me. What was my part in this race? How did I fail? How could I have prevented the dnf of my "A" race? The answer is simple. I need to be a better runner. Better able to handle ANY terrain thrown at me, regardless of how it is advertised. Better able to handle ANY weather, regardless of what time of year it is (I don't do well in temps close to 90 during races). Better able to discern the correct races to enter.

I thought I had investigated enough about PH100 before entering, but I am convinced now that I should have found an elevation chart, an objective course description, or even better, visited the course before I registered. Granted, I really did think I was given accurate information, but rest assured, I will never take an RD's word for anything ever again, unless his name is Joe Prusatis. He doesn't lie.

Here are the personal goals I decided upon after PH100 for 2012:

1. No 100 milers for 2012. Primary focus will be on the 50K - 50 mile distance with a possible culmination race at Bandera in 2013; 100K.

2. I will refrain from any race that requires the use of a pacer and a minimal, only if it's convenient, occasional crew. I felt that I let people down at PH 100 by not reaching my goal. I know that they don't feel that way, but I do and in order to alleviate myself of that emotional bag, I will stick to this plan for the year.

3. Focus will be on consistency, strength, confidence in runs on difficult terrain. This will involve rigorous cross-training of swimming, yoga, strengthening and if I can add it in, cycling.

4. For cost-effectiveness as well as convenience, I will run most every race in Texas, as many of Tejas Trails races that I can and strongly consider completing the Capt'n Karl's series this year. I will avoid as many comforts as possible, ie hotels, so as to add to the mental toughness I feel I need to acquire right now. I love to camp, and I camped the night before Rocky in 23 degree temps. It was a great race!

5. My training will be done to meet MY goals. While it is nice to have company for these long runs, I can no longer sacrifice my own "plan" just to have company. If our plans mesh, great, if not, then no hard feelings. I'm letting go of guilt this year. I will register for the races that I feel I can finish, not because a good friend is running it too.

Some may say that I am being too hard on myself. I am anyway, in my mind, so why not put it out in the open. I am responsible for what happened in Oklahoma. I dnf'd. I decided to stop. I wasn't fully prepared. I didn't have all the information. I spent a bunch of money that ended up being for naught. I should have done better. Next time I will. I don't regret the experience because I learned so much that I really needed to learn about myself, especially with respect to my running. I spent a wonderful weekend with my husband and some good friends.

Shortly after I devised my goals, I heard that Western States Lottery was about to open. I don't know what happened to me. I left these well-thought out, well-intentioned goals completely in the dust and threw my name in the proverbial hat. I entered the WS lottery, why? Because I could. Because I finished a 100 miler within the specified time period that the race officials require. Because my ego thought it would be cool. Because I can't stick with a goal to save my life. Because....

But just because I can, doesn't mean I should. The next morning, I realized what the heck I had just done. I entered the WS lottery. Sure, my chances of being selected were small. 2000 applicants, 350 slots. What are the odds? Right? What ARE the odds?
A Daily Mile friend suggested a book, Relentless Forward Progress. I have never before purchased a book for my kindle app on my phone, yet, I felt compelled to buy this book. I did and I quickly found my new mantra, my new threshold for which everything I do will now pass through. FOMO. Fear Of Missing Out. In the book, he is referring to why we feel burned out, depressed, anxious, etc, during our training and his answer is that we are too quick to sign up for so many races that we feel we may miss out on something.    This could not be more true for me. And I didn't even know it. The most successful athletes I know are meticulous about their training plans, even more methodical about the races they enter. Sure, I know a few who run everything and run every day and seem to be doing great, but most of the successful, balanced, and happy folks I know follow a carefully thought out plan and racing schedule which includes time for recovery, rest, and relaxation. I have been operating somewhat in this way in the last year, but I want to refine my approach to reflect what I want to become. And yet, I enter the WS lottery.

If you don't know, the WS lottery is drawn and you are immediately charged the 340.00 entry fee. There are no refunds, no transfers, no roll-overs to another year. This is an expensive price to pay for my ego's sake. I ran a few weeks ago with a group in Houston and met a guy who was selected FOUR YEARS IN A ROW! Now, I know people that have been on the lottery list many times and not yet gotten in, but this guy made it in FOUR TIMES! My chances of getting in seemed almost inevitable. And the saddest part about it all, I really had no TRUE desire to run this race, yet. I am not ready. Not physically, not emotionally, not spiritually, and not financially. The only reason, I could discern, was my ego. My pride. My stupidity.

I spent all of last week praying about what to do. I didn't know if it was possible to withdraw from the lottery, but I started believing that I should consider asking. I spoke with a trusted friend who has come to understand the inner workings of my mind, and he was able to help me sort through the ego and realize what I really wanted.   Finally, I asked myself one question, "If I could wake up tomorrow and be withdrawn from the lottery, how would I feel?" I knew then I had to ask about withdrawing. I knew because I would feel complete relief. I had even determined that if I had been selected, my ego deserved the 340.00 fine, so I have been holding that aside just in case I ended up having to pay up.

Tuesday, I contacted the RD of WS and briefly told him that I was in no shape to run WS at this time and would like to be sure that someone on the list of 2000 people that were hoping to get in should have the opportunity for that slot, not me.    He was so kind. He sent me words of encouragement to consider entering the lottery again next year and removed me from the lottery.   I was elated. And lesson was learned. Just because I can, doesn't mean I should.

Now my focus is back to where it needs to be. Appropriately, the book title, Relentless Forward Progress, seems to be another good mantra for me. Not hanging out with the negative stuff too long, only long enough to learn and then move on.

Happy running to all of you over this Advent season. Stay blessed, balanced, and run with joy!

It's Good to Feel Good!

2011-11-20T14:06:00.001-08:00

It seemed like the crud would never leave, but as I woke up yesterday morning, I discovered that all symptoms related to the last 8 weeks of crud had disappeared! This was a wonderful blessing, especially at 4:30 am!

H-Trex hosted a great run on the Ho Chi Minh Trail yesterday. I planned to arrive in plenty of time to find the group and start with everyone. I did get to Memorial park in plenty of time, unfortunately, at 5:30 am, it is still very dark, and having never been there before, I really had no idea where I was or where I was to go.

I parked near the softball fields and found an entrance to the trails. They were marked with flour so I knew I was on the right trail. I carried my gear and cooler about a half mile one direction with no luck of finding the start line. Turning around, I headed back in the other direction for about another half mile with still no luck.

Knowing I was on the right trail, I threw my gear into the back of my truck and figured I would just run the trail and find the start or some other runners eventually. It was dark and humid. My new Peztl head lamp worked wonderfully and stayed in place without a hat. I was glad that I had it with me.

The trail was quiet and dense with understory. As the sun began to emerge, I heard some men coming up behind me. As they passed me, they confirmed that they were with H-Trex and I fell in line behind them. It wasn't long before I realized, these were the front of the pack runners, of which I have no business trying to keep up with. No bother for them though, they didn't even think twice about me as I dropped off to my own pace.

I came upon the start line at about 2.5 miles from where I started. I checked in and started on my first loop, 45 minutes late because of the makeshift start line I created for myself. My first official loop was 7.5 miles instead of 5 as a result of this as well. If this had been a real race situation, I don't know if I would have continued because of the time factor, but to me, this was just a great way to get my mileage in for the weekend. This trail is a heavily used trail by runners, bikers, and walkers. I stepped off the trail to let the cyclists pass at least 20 times during the day. It was nice to know that I was not alone, but I also was glad I wasn't trying to pr a race.

My second loop I decided to run in reverse. Seemed like a nice idea. Funny thing about running in reverse, you go against the grain and the arrows seem to point in the wrong direction most of the time. I was feeling the run in my legs as this was the longest I had run since OK. I ended up catching a good sized root and took a hard fall, flying thru the air and landing on my shoulder and hip, even catching my hand trying to break the fall. I have only fallen one other time that hard, at the Ouachita 50 miler, which was a great blessing, because I met Brad! There was no one behind me on this fall, and I sat on the ground for a while assessing my condition. I knew something had to be broken as hard as I had hit that ground. My finger was really hurting and swelled immediately. My first thought...I can run with a broken hand. I stood up and discerned that though I was a bit torn up, I could absolutely run, but I needed to get moving because if I thought about it much longer, I might realize how bad I hurt. I didn't even brush myself off. Just got back to running. A few miles later, I did try to wipe myself down and noticed a good size knot and bruise on my thigh. The hand was still aching, but everything else felt fine. At some point I got myself turned around and ended up going around the same loop three times. Finally, I gave in and just ran the trail in the way it was marked and finished my 2nd 5 mile loop, only I clocked 8 miles.

The 3rd loop, really my 4th because of the mileage, I decided to run as prescribed and finish up strong. I had planned to run between 20-22 miles, and finishing the entire loop would put me at 20 miles with an extra 2.5 to the car again. I was definitely feeling tired so as I left the aid station I had the idea in my mind that if I was too wiped out, I would drop at my car and drive back to sign myself out. I was starving. Really, really hungry which has never, ever, ever happened to me during a run. Ever. But I wanted some french fries in a bad way! I ate some nuts and they seemed to take off the edge. I had been doubling up on S caps because of the level of humidity and this seemed to keep any cramps I might have had at bay.

As I came within a half mile or so of my car, I was blown away when I saw a HUGE coyote on the trail just a few feet ahead of me. I have never seen one before and at first glance, I thought it was a wolf. After researching when I arrived back at home, I decided it had to be a coyote, albeit a very large one. I was quite freaked out by this as he was not running in the woods off the trail but rather, directly ON the same trail that I was on. I was considering ending my run and this sealed the deal for me. Not knowing what would provoke a coyote to come out in the open during the daytime on a heavily used trail told me that I needed to get off the trail.

I exited the trail and logged a 20 mile run. I figure it was a 22 mile day with the extra walking I did trying to find the start line, but I logged 20. I was just over 4 hours, so it was a nice easy pace. I was happy with my efforts for the day.

Today I awoke for a run that I figured I would only last an hour or so. We met at Creekside and had a great run. Everything felt great, aside from some overall soreness left over from my fall. I think my shoulder and thigh are the worst of all, but thankfully, my hand is not broken and I can run without any pain.

Thanks to H-Trex for a wonderful new experience! One I hope to partake in again very soon!

Finding the Groove

2011-11-18T09:10:00.001-08:00

I've been away from the blog for almost a month so I figured I should post a little tidbit just to let the few of you that read this rag know that I am still around, still running, and working on finding the groove for the upcoming running year.

It's been a very interesting 8 weeks for me as I have been sick enough to be miserable since Sept 16, but not quite sick enough to shut everything down. I finally went to the doctor for steroids and antibiotics 5 weeks into this stuff and while they seemed to do the trick within hours, I have spent the last 3 weeks dealing with the effects of an allergic reaction to the meds.

I am about 85% healthy at this point and it has occurred to me that this may be as good as it gets. So sticking with training is what I've been doing and what I will continue to do. Things could certainly be worse for me, so I will embrace the 85% and run through the 15% yet not occupy anything other than my running shoes.

Speaking of shoes, I have been wearing the Brooks Pure Project Grit more and more and I am really enjoying them. As soon as my budget allows, I will be picking up a pair of the road shoe counterpart, The Flow, I believe. I hope to post more of a review soon.

For now, back to push ups and mom duty!

Enough Already

2011-10-21T08:57:00.000-07:00

Almost one week post race and I think I have had enough. Enough of second guessing myself. Enough of being mad at myself. Enough of being mad at the race. Enough of looking for explanations, excuses, encouragement, lessons, etc. I don't have regrets, but I do have a bit of a broken dream. Perhaps that is the way it should be at this point. So it's time to refocus. Last Saturday was a "goal race" but it does not define me. It was a great day of running that ended before I wanted it to. Hmmm, there's that word. "I".

I have a few goals left for the racing season. Part of me wants to drop those goals for fear of failure. Part of me wants to train like crazy and surpass those goals. But I have a nagging voice inside me that is telling me that what is most important. What my running always comes back to. Joy. Running with Joy.

If that involves casting aside the watches, the plans, the goals, the pressure, then so be it. I choose to run with Joy. I do not want to come away from another run feeling like I have this week. It is NOT what I want for my life.

This is a daily decision. This is a constant turning over of my will, my wants. This is a never-ending lesson in remaining open to what plans God has for me instead of what "I" have planned for me. And His plan is ALWAYS so much better!

Pumpkin Holler Hunnerd

2011-10-17T10:18:00.000-07:00

The short story is that I stopped at mile 49. The quads weren't having any more of the hills, no matter what I promised them. The Lessons:
1. Always carry more S caps.
2. I must find a way to effectively train for hills, especially downhills.
3. I need to find my pace and remain consistent.
4. Truly understand the type of course I am planning to race on. Consider elevation, terrain, and exposure.

Now for the long version.
The course for this inaugural race couldn't have been more scenic. Gorgeous views of the Illinois river, rolling hills, changing foliage, and wonderful people all rolled into a warm autumn day that seemed to have all the makings of a great race day.

All in all, it was a very good day. In fact, it was an amazing weekend! Mark and I were able to meet with some friends that made us feel at home for the weekend. Not only did Bill and Shelia put us up for the weekend, Bill also was one of the wonderful volunteers for the race and spent most all of Friday (beginning at o'dark thirty) and again back at the race site at 4 am on Saturday, working until the last runner went through his aid station on Sunday. To do all of this, he had to use his vacation time. That is some amazing dedication.

Brad and his wonderful wife, Rachel, welcomed us for a lovely visit to discuss the race plan, as Brad was to be my pacer. He was energized and ready to go, taking time off of work and away from his young family to help me reach my goal. By all accounts, aside from my tweaky ankle and achilles which has been in and out of a boot for the last two weeks, everything looked as if it were in order.

Mark and I enjoyed the later start time of 8 am and slept till about 5, then headed out to the start line. It was a bit chilly at 43 degrees, but that quickly became a non-issue.

The RD called the runners to the start line. There were three groups, 50K, 100K, and 100 milers. We were all to start together. I love smaller races for this reason. We all start together and get to visit along the route. Ken announced that the initial out and back for the 100 milers which was supposed to be 7 miles was actually closer to 8. He assured us that it would be ok because we would get the biggest hill in OK out of the way right away.

The gun was fired and off we went. The road was gravel and fairly flat. We crossed over the river via a beautiful old bridge, a bridge I was slated to cross 6 times during the run. Shortly after the bridge, the 100 milers veered right for our extra out and back while the rest of the pack went left to begin their respective loops for their race distance.

The course quickly changed to a tree-covered, gravel road that seemed to have a constant incline to it. There were areas with steeper hills and then nice down hills. I walked the uphills and enjoyed coasting the downs, while still trying to maintain my 8/2 running/walking method.   I met a few folks along the way, all just as nice as anyone I've ever met. A gal, Laci, from Nebraska, attempting her first 100. Randy Ellis, whom I had heard so much about from Bill. A wonderful, gentleman whom I wish I could have visited longer with. Several others and I chatted though I never got their names. One young man, a Navy man, attempting not only his first 100, but his first trail RUN, never mind race! Another young man from nearby Muskogee that had only driven the trail once or twice.    I also came upon Deborah Sexton at one point near the end of the first loop. We were both hurting by then, so I don't really recall what we spoke of. I probably was doing a lot of whining by then. Several of us ran the "biggest hill in Oklahoma" together and we agreed that we were certainly glad we got it over early.

As I came through the start/finish aid station, people were yelling "First Woman!" at me. This may seem like good news to some, but to me, this set me up for a mental battle that I wasn't prepared for. Never in my wildest dreams would I ever have dreamed myself to be in such a position. I had to tell myself continually, this is a long race. You are only a few miles in and you are going WAY too FAST! SLOW DOWN! I tried slowing and I thought I was, but no one was passing me. I made it to the second aid station, Mad Dog, and again, FIRST WOMAN!   Ugh. This is not my goal...this is not my goal, was playing in my head. I ducked into the woods hoping someone would pass me. No one did. I walked all the uphills and ran the downhills and tried to maintain the 8/2 pattern, but this was becoming more difficult as I was hitting hill after hill after hill. Relatively flat...my butt. There was not much flat to this course at all.

I continued on to the next aid station, Out and Back. The folks running the aid stations couldn't have been more friendly, more helpful. They were truly amazing. What wasn't so amazing was the disappearance of the tree canopy. Within an instant, I found myself in very exposed, hilly, and continued gravel road. I should mention that I have never really run on gravel before. I had always assumed gravel roads and dirt roads were the same thing.   In Massachusetts, we called any dirt road a gravel road, so perhaps this is where my misunderstanding is rooted from.

As I came back through Out and Back, (mile 10.2 for some, 18.2 for the 100 milers) I was still leading the girls. I made a decision that at the next aid station, I would sit in the port-a-potty until at least 2 women passed me.

As I approached Savannah, the hills became more steep. I could see Bill on the horizon cheering us all into the aid station. He was encouraging us and loving on us and even ran a few steps with me promising that the hills would end soon. I was hopeful that the backside of the loop would be flat and that this would give my legs a reprieve. I think it was at this point that I realized that the road I was running on was really not a trail, it was a road.   There was nothing soft or forgiving about this road. And as the sun beat down on me from the top, the ground beat on me from the bottom. Everything was hurting at this point. From the top of my head to the bottom of my feet, everything was screaming OUCH!   I mentioned this to Bill, and he mentioned that he had some Motrin at the aid station.

I met Mark at Savannah and quickly ducked into the can. I heard several people pass by and as I came out, I saw two girls take the lead. Thank you, Lord. That pressure was off. I don't know why I let that play with my head so much, but, it did.

I downed some coconut water, filled my bottle, ate some Motrin, handed off my extra layer and left out of the aid station looking forward to flatter terrain. Within minutes, I found myself climbing more hills. My calves were already cramping so I doubled up on the S caps and walked more. Even while walking I somehow caught up to Laci, the # 2 woman. She was struggling with a hamstring issue. As we played leap frog, we commiserated with one another. She would stop in the middle of the trail to stretch her hamstring, I would stop to stretch my calf. It was nice to have a voice to hear other than my own.

I found myself soon alone again, however, with Laci still battling her hamstring. My S caps and coconut water seemed to do the trick with the cramping of the calves, at least for a little while. The hills continued to show up and then the tree canopy disappeared again. I pressed on hoping still that the course would eventually begin to flatten out.

I came into the Hard Up aid station and Mark was there again. He really did an amazing job as my crew! I didn't expect to see him there, but I was so glad he was there! I was again beginning to cramp and the sun was burning me. I never thought to put on sunscreen or even bring my sunglasses. I don't usually have to worry about these two things on trail runs. Mark filled my bottle again and I downed more coconut water. He was giving me updates from my friends, most of whom were reminding me to slow down and double up on the S caps, which I was already doing. Unfortunately, I ran out of S caps as I didn't plan to have to double up on the first loop. I always carry extra, but for whatever reason, this day, I didn't do that.

There seemed to be quite a few residents driving the course. I don't know if they were just curious or if the road is always that busy, but each vehicle that went by kicked up a fair amount of dust and made for difficult breathing. Just more fun in the pot of good times.

My hydration was good. I was emptying my bottles between aid stations and seemed to be emptying my bladder often enough. All good signs that I wasn't dehydrating. I headed out of Hard Up onto Last Gasp, thinking to myself...there can only be one reason that this station is called Last Gasp...more hills.

Very shortly after leaving Hard Up, the gravel road turned to a black top road, completely uncovered in the heat of the day. I don't do well in these circumstances. The hills continued and with each one, I just shook my head in a sort of disgust. Music wasn't helping, prayer wasn't helping. I was just plain miserable. At some point on this section of road, a dog came up behind me and while he wasn't aggressive, he was very "happy" and jumped up on me. I tried to push him away and took a nice bite on the hand. He didn't mean to bite me, but this really took me by surprise.

I think the black top continue for several miles, until just before the Last Gasp. I hit the gravel road once more, the final aid station and headed into the start/finish. I was still 2nd woman at this point, but I knew that I would be resting a good while at the aid station.

I crossed that beautiful bridge for the 4th time of the day and found myself quickly in a chair. I told Mark I wasn't going anywhere for awhile. I needed to have a think about the situation. I was completely drained. I was completed deflated by my prospect on those hills for not just one, but two more loops. I felt as if I had already run 70 something miles, not 40.

As I sat there, having my think, Mark doctored me up with food, drink, pickle juice. Everything he could think of. Mexican coke in hand, I started to feel a bit better. My head was back in the game and after about a 25 minute rest stop, I donned the hydration vest and headed back out.

Again, the road was fairly flat until about a mile from the start and then the hills started all over again. I tried running, but the quads were spent. My head was ok. My mood was ok. My legs quit. I figured I'd walk for awhile till they decided to show up. I alternated between a run and a walk. I couldn't muster more than a few steps without having to start walking again. And as I gained a bit of a run, a hill would show up, which I had to walk. The downhills I took slowly. But it wasn't long before I knew it was over. I decided to not make a decision until I reached the first aid station, which was reportedly 4 miles out. Hill after hill after hill, miles came and went, running was near impossible. Maybe five feet at most ten feet at a time. This was making for a painstakingly slow 4 miles. As I looked at my watch, I noticed I was at mile 4.8, with no aid station in site. At this point, I became angry. I don't know who or what I was angry at, but I was angry. I suppose thinking that aid station was at 4 miles and not at 5 was the infamous straw for me. The thought of going over these hills twice more, possibly having another dog come at me in the dark, the self-doubt and realization that walking 50+ miles was what I was looking at and I didn't like it one bit.

Finally, at mile 5, I saw the aid station, I saw another runner getting into the car to head back to the finish and I told them to wait for me. As I hobbled to the car, one aid station worker asked if I was sure. I suppose the glare from my eyes said it all...he walked away and never looked back. He knew I was done.

I managed to throw myself into the back seat and couldn't believe I was throwing in the towel. The volunteers driving us back told us that many people were taken back by the amount of hills this "relatively flat" course had. The gentleman that was also heading back was dropping from the 100K. He was just as upset as I. It was a long car ride back, but the ladies were so encouraging. We came upon several runners, all of whom were walking at this point, and cheered them from the car.

I reached the start/finish and was never happier. I didn't see Mark, so I used someone's phone to call him and tell him that I was done. He was surprised, but came to see what was going on. I wanted to be sure to get the message to Brad before he drove all the way out to the race for no reason.

While the RD states he will record my 50K time as a finish, I can't really accept that. I set out to finish a 100 miler and I didn't do that. I am ok with my decision, though I am not happy about it. I was most disappointed in not being able to run with Brad. I felt pretty badly about not meeting my goal. Everyone did so much to help me, so much to support me, and I feel disappointed in myself for not meeting my end of the plan.

God and I had a long talk out on the trail. I asked Him to take over if it was His will for me to continue. I told Him that I understood He knows my heart and that if what I want didn't mesh with His will, I was ok with that. Perhaps there was a different lesson in all of this for me today.

I have hashed this out with a few friends, and I understand this. My disappointment comes not from an incomplete 100 miler, but more, that I could have let others down. But my support system is so wonderful that they do not feel let down. They are encouraged and inspired by my efforts, and I am left with two feelings. I am so blessed and so loved. I couldn't ask for anything more. My inspiration and my encouragement comes from those around me, near and far. Those who are willing to take time from their families to send words of hope, prayers, and well wishes. Those who give of themselves physically and never complain or expect anything in return. Those who take care of me when I am discouraged. Those who take care of my family when I am absent.

I have said before, this is NOT something that I can do alone. First and foremost, my help comes from Him. And then, I watch His hands and feet serve me and help me to reach my goals. I stand in awe of all of those beautiful souls.

Race Week

2011-10-10T08:39:00.000-07:00

One of the biggest challenges in my life is remaining completely present within the moment I am in. I have an uncanny knack for living in the future. Waiting with great anticipation for things that are to come. Even to the point of great anxiety and fear and at the expense of losing the moment I should be embracing.

My goal this week is to remain present with the children as we do school, chores, errands, etc. The simple activities of the day can provide so many opportunities to deepen our relationship with one another, and I am sad to say, I often miss these opportunities because I am planning, worrying, getting ready for something yet to be.

While I do need to prepare for the race, I am going to leave my focus on the present. It's all I have. That saying, tomorrow may not come, is so true, and what good is my life if all I have ever done is looked ahead to the moments I "think" I may have the privilege of living rather than embracing the ones I am given every minute of the day?

Simple Mom is a favorite blog of mine and her post today could not have come at a better time for me. While she and I are going through different scenarios of life, the sentiment is the same. The grass is greener where you water it.

Rest, then Taper

2011-10-07T15:22:00.000-07:00


It makes an excellent standing aid.

I had to take a few extra days of rest last week due to a very sore left ankle and some continued respiratory junk left over from the week before.

On Monday and Tuesday of this week, I was fully prepared to take on my low mileage taper week and not complain about how low the miles would be. Strangely, as I began to run, I felt a twinge in the RIGHT ankle. I cut that run short and took the cue to ice it and administer Advil.

Tuesday, I swam and ran a few on the treadmill and it seemed better, but not great. Waking up Wednesday, I was limping pretty badly. Darn those rest days! A few days off and I start to fall apart.
I've been donning "the boot" again and complaining the whole time. I hate that thing. Trying to rest the Achilles so it is ready for next week. I haven't run since Tuesday and I'm a nut job.

100 push ups yesterday. 125 today. More tomorrow, I'm sure. Still doesn't take the edge off. Just leaves me with really sore shoulders.

May go swim or row tonight. Hoping all of this fades away just as quickly as it showed up. The apocalypse in my head is spinning out of control.

Shoe Review - Brooks Pure Project PureGrit

2011-10-04T08:44:00.000-07:00

Who doesn't get excited when seeing this little blue box?!

And who doesn't love free stuff?! All of this came with my new shoes!

I should preface this review with the disclaimer that I am NOT a professional runner. I am NOT a professional product reviewer. Any opinions I state here are purely my uneducated experience I have had with this shoe.

I have been running in Brooks almost my entire running career, a short career of 5 years. I had a brief stint with Asics when I first began, switched to Brooks Adrenaline shortly thereafter, and after a hip stress fracture, I realized that I was running in the wrong shoe and had too much structure to my shoes. While running trails, I have ALWAYS run in the Brooks Cascadia which is a neutral trail shoe. It should be said that I LOVE my Cascadias. What was interesting to me I could not understand why I needed so much support in road running, but seemed to need less on the dirt. Running in the neutral Cascadia gave me the confidence I needed to switch to the Glycerine last year and I have felt very, very comfortable in my neutral road shoes.

I did read Born to Run and while I can appreciate the minimalist approach to running, I don't think it is a good fit for me, at this point. I am always interested in a lighter shoe with trends toward the "less is more" approach.

A few weeks ago, I had the good fortune of winning a gift card to Luke's Locker at the Casa 5K. With that in hand, I headed to Luke's to see about some shoes. I have been watching and waiting for the launch of the new Brooks Line of shoes, Pure Project since early this summer. A few reviews had come across my path and though I am not a "minimalist" runner, I was intrigued by this new, lightweight, but not necessarily minimalist style shoe.

I tried on a few others that have had my eye as well. Specifically, the NB Minimus and the Merrell Trail Glove. While both of these shoes appeal to my sense of "less is more" and at first glance were very comfortable, a few steps on the treadmill and I knew that there is no way I was ready for them. They are very minimal in nature and I am just not there in my gait yet.

I then asked about the PureGrit. What I knew is that the heel drop was 4mm, so not quite at the same level as the other two shoes I had tried on, but certainly a shift from the 12 mm heel drop that I currently have on my Cascadias. The shoe jock brought them out and I gave them a whirl. They felt great going on and I took a spin in them on the tread mill. I could feel a difference in the heel, but I knew that I would experience this from the outset.

I was ready to take the new treads home only to find out that they could not be sold till the next day, October 1st. I was heartbroken. Anyone who knows me, knows how much I love new shoes, especially new running shoes. Knowing I would have to wait to come back and purchase them was Pure alright, pure torture.

I left the store, dismayed and deflated, but I did return to pick them up on October 2nd, exercising my patience muscle. Probably the best part about buying these shoes was the final out of pocket expense for me. With my gift card and running club member discount, these beauties cost me 16.00!

I knew I was going to have to wait a day to try them out since I had already run on Sunday morning. I also knew that I would not be able to tolerate a long run in them as I needed to get acclimated to them over what I figured would be a few runs.

Last evening was the moment I had been waiting for. I took the new babies out of their box and slipped them on. First thing I noticed when putting them on was how very, very light they were. 7.6 ounces vs the Cascadia 10.4 ounces makes a huge difference.

I also loved the wide elastic strap across the nicely padded tongue of the shoe. This made for a comfortably snug fit without the necessity of having to tie the laces too tightly. I love a snug shoe, but I have found that if I tie the laces as tightly as I'd like, I end up with numbness in my foot. This is not an issue with the Grit. Very nice feature.

The shoes truly feel like as if they could be your favorite house slipper. Comfortable, cushioning the boney areas of my feet, under the ball of the foot. They were springy and yet, I could feel the ground beneath me.
The sole of the shoe has a one piece construction and seems very durable with rugged tread needed for the dirt. There is a small split between the Great toe and the others and I believe this helps with the flexibility of the shoe and therefore the foot while traversing the rocks and such.

I headed out to the trail to run a short while before Yoga class. I have been experiencing some Achilles Tendon pain in the right foot the last week or so and hoped that this would not be an issue. The trail I ran had a nice flat, compact dirt aspect with a few rocks and sticks scattered about. I could "feel" the trail much more effectively than in any other shoe I have run in. Right away, I noticed the heel drop. While running in the store, it didn't seem too significant of a change, but within 15 mins, I knew I was going to have to ease into these shoes.

My feet felt very comfortable. My toes had plenty of room, and the legs felt much lighter than normal. I run a few inclines and interestingly enough, felt like my legs were doing a bit more work than usual.
I even noticed my pace was up quite a bit, but that was short-lived.

By mile 1.5, both legs were feeling the effects of the lower heel drop and the calves were burning. I took several walk breaks of a short duration to ease up the unpleasant feeling I was experiencing. That feeling coupled with the Achilles issue on the right foot, gave me reason to stop at mile 3. I figured out very quickly that the next two weeks should not be about trying out new shoes. I have a 100 coming up and that needs to be my focus.

I also realized that though my running gait has changed quite a bit, I am still quite the heel striker. I am definitely not striking the heels as hard as I used to, but I am not by any stretch of the imagination a mid to fore-foot runner, yet.

If I had to offer any negatives about the shoe thus far, my suggestion would be color. I always feel drawn to the colors of the mens shoes. I wish shoe folks would get that women don't always need "girly" colors. I prefer power colors like red, orange, black, neon green, etc. I love my bright yellow and bright green Cascadias. Getting them dirty is a badge of honor and seemingly a right of passage for any trail runner. Somehow, brown trail shoes seem somewhat anti-climactic. How can I possibly get these things dirty?

I really, really like the PureGrit. And I look forward to getting home from this race and taking them out for a few miles. I will need to keep the runs shorter at first until I feel that my gait has acclimated to the change. I am not willing to risk an injury at this point or really at any point just for a shoe.

Are you Awesome?

2011-09-21T08:57:00.000-07:00

I haven't been feeling so "awesome" this week thanks to a nasty cold and tired ankle. A friend sent me this post from a blog she reads and it picked me up instantly!

Boo and Little NG are both 5 years old, and they are still AWESOME! Enjoy the post!

Philippians 4:13

2011-09-20T09:47:00.000-07:00

Casa For Kids 5K

2011-09-19T18:50:00.000-07:00

I had registered for this race on a whim a few weeks back, thinking I could somehow fit it in between a series of back to back long runs. Some of the Texas Trail Nerds, Bill, Erica, and Nicholas were planning to be there as well. Our kids were registered for the 1K fun run and they were very excited about participating in their race.

As my week unfolded, I realized that planning to run this race was probably not the smartest thing I have ever done, as it was cutting into the only real time I had to get my long run in. I planned to run 30 on Friday night and then 15 or 20 on Saturday. Well, Saturday also happened to be the day of this race, Homecoming for my son, and the Third Day concert that I was NOT going to miss.

Friday night didn't go well at all. It was one of those runs where nothing felt right from the first step till the last. I had issues with calf/ankle pain that would not release it's grip until the 6 mile mark. Oftentimes after a rest day, my legs have a hard time settling into a run, but after about 3 or 4 miles, they are ok. Not this time. I was having watch issues, mp3 player issues, attitude issues, etc. I also had quite a bit on my mind and while running typically helps me to figure things out, that was not the case on Friday.

I stopped at the park rest room only to find a line at 7:30 at night! I lost a good 15 mins waiting as I really couldn't run much longer without a visit and there were no other rest rooms along the route that would be open when I would be passing by them.

I kept plodding along, trying to lose myself in the music, in prayer, in anything, but nothing was working. When dark set it, I was not were I expected to be on my route. There was no shoulder to run on and the pathways were too dark to navigate. My light was sitting on the counter at home, yet another glitch in the run.

By the time I reached Grogan's Mill, I had to run with the flow of traffic, no lights, no shoulder, and the calf/ankle pain set in again. I had to start walking to get my focus back on the run and off of the pain. By mile 17, I called Mark and told him I would finish up my 20 but I would not go back out for the 10 mile loop that he was planning to ride with me. I was behind about an hour and we needed to have at least one of us home for the kids.

Mark convinced me to let him pick me up. He knew that I was in quite a lot of pain to call the run off. He drove out to meet me and my run ended at mile 18.

Saturday morning I knew I was not in any shape to run a 5K. But I donned my bib, just in case. We got the kids up and ready and headed out to the race. We met the Nerds out there and had a great time visiting with everyone.


Evan and I


Erica and I and her beautiful daughter behind us

Time came for the kids to run and it was so much fun to see such little cuties running their hearts out! Fish and Boo were among them and Foo ran with Boo to encourage him. Seeing those boys come across the finish line was so incredible! I am so proud of them! I know that they had a great time and I hope that they continue to show interest in running.


Boo Crossing The Finish Line


Fish Crossing The Finish Line

As the 5K racers lined up, Mark asked what I was doing. I told him I would run, but take it slow. I wanted to see how my leg felt. It hurt a little, but not like it was hurting the night before. Mark yelled out that I should run it fast because the kids were hungry...

Gary, the RD made mention of the Trail Nerds which was nice! He also mentioned that someone at the start line had run a 30 miler the night before (that will teach me for posting on Facebook about my intentions!). I hung my head in shame. I was so embarrassed to have someone build me up like that knowing that I had failed. As outgoing and extroverted as I am, I really don't like being the center of attention. I did mention to his wife, Denise, when I saw her that I did not reach the 30 mile mark and she was kind enough to let him know that.

The race started and I settled into a fairly "moderate" pace that felt comfortable and I had no pain, at least nothing more than I had just standing around. I really didn't feel like I was pushing myself too hard, but I did notice I was passing several people. Susie and I even ran together and I consider her to be a very talented runner, and quite speedy! She was trying out her new shoes and we were chatting along the way. Soon she passed me and I kept both her and Evan in my sights. I never tried to catch them as I really didn't intend to do anything except enjoy the run.

Around mile 2, I noticed my leg was beginning to ache a bit more, so I figured the sand wasn't helping. I tried to stay on as much of the packed dirt as possible. At mile 2.5 or so, I heard someone yell out, "You are the 3rd female!" Something in my brain said, "WHAT?! How is this possible?" And the next thing I heard was a man yelling out to someone behind me, "Kelly, you can pass her! Come on! You can pass her!" I don't know what happened, but I decided at that moment that no one was passing me, picked up my legs and crossed the finish line in 24:55. That was good enough for 1st Overall Female Masters winner. I was about 20 seconds behind Susie who took 1st Overall Female. Amazing race for her too!

Susie! Amazing woman, amazing athlete!

Best Family on the planet!

This 5K was a PR for me. What is strange is that I never felt as though I was racing it until the last 2/10s of a mile. A PR on a dirt trail. Maybe my running is paying off? Maybe I got lucky? Maybe I wasn't hung up on numbers and pace (watch was at home) and just ran by feel? I have no idea how or why it happened, but it felt nice and I hope to always cherish this moment.

40 Done

2011-09-13T08:25:00.000-07:00

The course was laid out and the decision was made to run as far as I could taking my breathing into consideration. Thankfully, this was never an issue the entire day.
I started out on my first ten @ 4:45am. I was actually awake at 3, but couldn't bring myself to actually start running at that time.
Running under the night sky is always so surreal for me. The air was humid, but the sky was clear (no smoke from the fires) and the stars where bright. The moon was full and provided adequate light for my run, though I still wore my own lights for safety.
The first 10 miles clicked by quickly. I met Richard at mile 10 and we had a nice run through the old Nature Trail of Grogan's mill. I love that trail, but after an unusual experience out there I won't run it by myself anymore. It's not really a "trail" as it is concrete, but it is very serene and more wooded than any other "trail" in The Woodlands.
We looped around the Millbend loop and saw lots of folks out on the run, many of them preparing for fall marathons. I had heard from several people that they were running 20+ milers and they invited me to join them. I tried to figure a way to make it work, but that would involve me driving to a location just a few miles away and I really preferred to use my home as an aid station and meeting point.
Richard and I had 7 great miles together. Love running with good friends! Talking about whatever comes up and changing subjects about as often as our minds feel is necessary.
Richard and I parted ways as he headed home and I headed to my "aid station". The first 20 seemed almost effortless. I can tell I'm in good shape when I feel that way.
I heard from Bill that he was on his way, so I decided to wait at the house for him rather than have him try to find me on the road. He was coming quite a way to support me and I will never be able to express how much I appreciate his efforts! I checked my facebook to see how Paul was doing on his run and he was at mile 37 looking for some motivation. I sent mine along and sent a prayer or two with it! I was a tiny bit jealous that he was already at mile 37...but I knew I would be there soon enough.
Bill arrived, prepared his bike, and we were off. I wasn't sure how long he would ride with me. I figured maybe 10 miles or so, but then he shared that he was riding the rest of my 20 with me, I was blown away! Amazing! I was going to have company the whole time!
I had originally planned to run all of the Villages this side of the freeway. I had mapped out routes that would allow me to hit even Creekside which is in a different county. But when Bill showed up, I changed my mind and decided I would rather show him some of the trails that I run in the Nature Preserve. I had planned to run one 20 mile loop and then two different 10 mile loops.
We left out of my home and headed towards the Nature Preserve. It's about 2.5 miles to Mitchell and by the time we arrived, it was much warmer and the trails were very busy! There was an Adventure Racing group from Houston out in force. Seemed like a great bunch of people and they even invited us to a race in Huntsville! One of these days...
I was happy to be able to share the trail with Bill. We don't get to see each other's stomping grounds very much at all. I hope to get to his neck of the woods this coming weekend. I'm dying to see Lake Houston's new trails.
The trails felt like heaven to me. No pain, soft ground, and of course, lots of beautiful dirt. It's just who I am.

We headed out the short way home to take advantage of the park restrooms. A pretty funny event occurred on the way back in. As we were waiting to cross the road at Woodlands Parkway, I noticed a friend of mine, Ellen, waiting at the light in her car, as I was saying hello to her, a landscape truck was driving past. Out of no where, a large industrial lawn mower rolled off the back of his pull-along trailer and rolled directly into the oncoming traffic. All of this was happening directly in front of Bill and I. We flagged down the truck and I ran to the mower trying to pull it out of the way of oncoming traffic. It weighed about two times more than I do and I'm sure it had to be a sight to see me trying to pull this mower out of a major roadway. To say I was unsuccessful would be an understatement. Bill came to the rescue and pulled the thing to the side of the road. Motorists were thanking us and the lawn guy casually strolled up to us to get his mower. I don't know why he wasn't more concerned about moving a bit faster, but after 27 miles, I didn't really care. Coming back into my make shift aid station, we were short about 3 miles. One thing I don't like to do is to add miles on at the end of a run, especially a long run. I'd rather add on at the beginning. I knew this last loop was going to be a bit more work than the first 2.
We refueled, I even got to harass my son for a bit before we headed out for the final 13. The loop was fairly uneventful, though the last 3 miles were quite challenging mentallyI thought of Paul and his request for inspiration at mile 37. I chuckled to myself that I felt the same way.

50K mark

I wanted to stop, but I knew I couldn't. There were several early cut backs to the house and to pass them up was almost like torture, but with Bill hanging with me, I was able to keep my eye on the end goal. I had received a text from Nicholas letting me know that he was running the loop in reverse looking for me. This helped my spirits and kept my head in the game. I knew that us finding each other was a rather slim possibility since I changed my route a little bit to add on the extra 2 miles, but knowing he was out there offered me great support. Also knowing that Paul and Reece were putting down some tracks made me feel as though we were all running together, if only in my mind.
The home stretch was just that. I allowed my legs to stretch out and just embrace the final few miles of the run. I wasn't worried about pace nor overall time. I wanted to hit 40. I asked Bill to make sure that no matter what happens, when we hit my door at 39.5 miles, his main job was to get my butt to 40. No matter what. I shared with him how I did not want 39.anything showing up in my log that day. It had to be 40. I don't know why I get hung up on a number, but I do. 39.7 would not have been 40. Neither would 39.9. I knew that if I hit the driveway under 40, I would tell myself that was good enough and that I would regret it later. He promised he would make sure we hit my goal.

We arrived at my driveway and he quickly set his bike aside and ran with me. It was pretty hot (around 97 I think) by this time and the sun was unforgiving. The saying "the last mile is the toughest, no matter what the mileage goal is" was definitely ringing true. We finished up the final mile and then celebrated our little accomplishment.

Finished!

I have always said that my running is not something I am able to do alone. Yes, some of my runs are solo, but I am never alone. Thank you to everyone who offered kind thoughts, words, and prayers for me and to Richard, Bill, and Nicholas, thanks for getting out there in a very real way to help me reach my goal!

I get by with a lot of help from my friends!

My nutrition for the day went well. I carried the hydration vest for the first loop, handhelds for the last 20. I ate S caps every 30 mins. and honey chews every hour. I also ate a soy yogurt and some fruit at the house in between loops.
My stomach never felt upset and I never felt dehydrated. I came in 6 pounds under my start weight and I have yet to gain it back.
The hardest part of this run was the 10 miler I did on Sunday and even more, the 6 I did on Monday. Things are sore now and I really don't want to injure myself so slow and patient miles are the order of the day/week. This week will be another heavy mileage week. I have had to let some of my cross-training go this week in order to fit it all in and keep up with the family schedule.
As always... run with joy in your heart and peace in your soul!

Mental Preparation

2011-09-08T12:25:00.000-07:00

I have been struggling to wrap my mind around the idea of running a 40 miler on the roads this weekend. Seems ridiculous to worry about it, but I suppose after my DNF at The Shoe, this training run will be more about the cognitive aspect of running rather than the physicality of running 40 miles.

I found my post from this past January that I wrote after I ran that 40. It was helpful today to help me recall that this run will only be as much fun as I allow it to be.

I have extended an invitation to whomever would like to run some or all(!!) of this run with me to let me know and I will be happy to forward along a map of the route.

Run with Joy in your Heart!

40 Days

2011-09-05T08:08:00.000-07:00

40 Days till Pumpkin Holler Hunnerd. Just coming off of a week of recovery from The Shoe, I feel fairly rested and ready to hit the training as hard as I can to endure the crunch time before the race.

I am scheduled to hit two fairly long runs which will most likely be solo adventures and unsupported. There are obvious negatives in that, but I need to focus on the positives at this point. I would like to try to hit Huntsville for at least one of the long runs. Running there alone is definitely not the smartest thing to do, so I will seek out a few companions.

Running on my own will help to prepare me mentally for the later stages of the race before Brad picks me up and paces me in.

40 Days. Uniquely significant number in my life. Lent. Days Christ spent in the desert. A time for reflection, repair, and preparation for what was and what is to come. I have an opportunity to grow in this 40 days or stay exactly where I am. The choice is mine and today, I chose growth.

Capt'n Karls The Shoe 60K

2011-08-30T08:22:00.000-07:00

This was the last race in the series of Capt'n Karls Trail series for 2011. Last year, I attempted the 1st in the series, The Lake, and swore I would never attempt it again. Officially, I didn't attempt The Lake again, however, The Shoe became a possibility.

I was looking forward to this race with great anticipation as I felt I could have a good race and that would somehow redeem my DNF at The Lake in 2010. I was also hoping this would be a good barometer of where my running fitness is as I head into a fairly busy racing season.

Strength building, cross-training, and smarter running have given me the sense of a much leaner, yet stronger body. And this race proved to me that it isn't always about these things.

The temperature at the start of the race was 104. It was the hottest day on record in Houston, I'm not sure about the Austin area. The heat didn't seem to really bother me, however. I knew it would be hot, as it has been all summer. I was happy that I had done most of my runs outdoors to acclimate to the heat. I knew I wasn't going to use the heat as an excuse for a poor performance.

We had a caravan of sorts heading from The Woodlands to Muleshoe bend, stopping for lunch at Subway near Giddings. It was great to see Erica and Nicholas along the way. This would be Nicholas' first trail race, and an amazing one at that.

Stacy had decided to also run at the last minute, and she rode up with us. We checked into the hotel, had about 30 mins to rest, and then headed to the race. Along the way, we could see signs of the cruel Texas drought that has really taken hold of this part of the state. The Pedernales River has no water to speak of within it's banks. The docks that once held boats and rope swings are now lying in the bottom of a dry river bed.

We heard reports that the lakes were also down, some as much as 50%. Everywhere you looked, the grass was brown to black if there was any at all. Most locations, the grass was completely gone and only dry, dusty dirt remained in its place.

At the race site, our wonderful crew, Mark and Erica, set up our personal aid station. It was so nice. Everything we wanted just a few feet from the start line. I didn't stop into the official aid station for anything the entire race.

We found a few Daily Mile guys, Paul and Reece, and snapped a few pictures. It was nice to meet everyone; I wish I could have met the other DM'ers that were there that I missed.

After the pre-race briefing, we had a few minutes to fidget with things and then the infamous, "Go!" was sounded. On the first loop, there was an out and back that was added on to get the mileage to a full 60K. This was a nice little look at the flatter part of the park and a view of the very low, but beautiful, Lake Travis. Despite the intense dryness of this area, it is still a glorious place to see.

Heading past our makeshift aid station, Stacy and I waved good bye to the crew and headed into the first loop.

Stacy took the lead, since I tend to go out too fast, and I really wanted to stick with a slower 1st loop to learn the course and start out with a good nutrition plan. We ran our 8/2 pattern as much as possible, sometimes fudging it a bit for the terrain we were on the the time. We did salt on the 48 mins and ate on the 58 mins. I was drinking plenty of water, and seemed to need to refill at each aid station. All seemed well. I was feeling good. I was running a pace that I felt I could run all day. It was warm, but under the trees, I was protected from the sun, so it really didn't seem to bother me. I couldn't help but think about how blessed I am to be able to do what I love to do!

The first aspect of the course was full of little inclines and lots of smaller rocks. It proved challenging at points, but it wasn't unmanageable. This course reminded of the Ouachita 50 course. Very beautiful. After the first aid station, the course changed to large, outcroppings of rock that seemed to sit on a nice angle. The "trail" was difficult to see as it was mostly rock and I felt like we were using our trail gut to find the deer trails. There were a few spots where several of us were standing around asking, "where is the trail now?" But it was gorgeous, and the sun was beginning to set, showing us an amazing display of colors.
I began to notice that Stacy was taking things much slower than I expected, but I figured she was pacing us for the better. Then we were slower, and then we were doing more walking than running. I knew she wasn't feeling well, but I waited for her to say something.

After the third aid station, we had 3 miles left of the first loop. I felt wonderful. I knew Stacy did not. She told me that she had a migraine started. I assured her that we would get her back to the start/finish and that I would go on. The last 1/3 of the loop was not too hilly, not too rocky, and seemed to just roll along. We finished loop one with the o/b in 2:15. Not too bad, and on target for my time goal.

I filled up on nutrition and water and headed back out for another round. Loop 2 felt great. It was now pretty dark and the second third of the trail which was difficult to navigate the first time around, became easier as there were glow sticks to help light the way. (Thanks to all the volunteers out there...you guys rock!)

The second loop went by fairly uneventfully, just eating and drinking and enjoying the ride. I came into the start finish and could hear Erica cheering for me. This was so nice! You don't usually get much cheering at a trail race, unless you are one of the elite guys. She got other folks to join in, (she gets the spirit award) and people I didn't know were cheering me into the aid station. It was so nice and so uplifting! Time for the second loop 2:10.

The third loop started out just like the other two. Felt great. Met some folks along the way and talked as we ran. I was able to share some faith moments with a young lady and that is always something I look to take away from the experience. We made it to the first aid station, and my bottle was dry. I remember thinking, it felt like an extra long time to get to that aid station, but I was talking, so perhaps we had slowed a bit.

I allowed some space between myself and the folks I was talking with for the second part of the trail as I wanted to focus completely on the trail. I was still feeling fine, just had some fatigue in the legs. After the second aid station, I felt little things that were giving me reason for concern, but given the mileage I had run, I really didn't think of them as "signs" of anything serious. I had a few stumbles on rocks and when I would hit them, both of my legs would instantly go into cramps. I was able to keep upright and not let the cramping take hold, so I figured all was well. It was just leg fatigue.

Just before the 2nd aid station, I felt like I needed my glasses to see. Weird. But again, maybe just fatigue. It was after midnight after all. I also noticed I was having a hard time eating and drinking and my stomach was not feeling so wonderful. I took a few papaya and kept moving along. I was walking a little more than I wanted to, but I expected to slow down as I became more tired. I finished the 3rd loop in 2:25. Still ok for my time goal.

I made it into the start/finish again, and decided to take my Nathan vest instead of the handheld for the last loop. I drank a coke, ate some potatoes and sat for a minute. The crew didn't let me stay long as they push me back onto the trail. As I headed out onto the trail, I really didn't feel so well. Things turned ugly very quickly. I am in awe of how fast I deteriorated. My stomach was a mess and I wished I could throw up, but I couldn't. I tried to drink, tried to eat, but to no avail. Everything made me feel worse. I even sat down in a few places. I realized that I had not used the bathroom at all for the entire race. I tried with no luck. So I walked. The death march had set in. I ran in small spurts, but most of my effort was at a fast walking pace. I was pleased with the pace and if I could maintain it, I would still finish and wouldn't be out on the trail too long. This time, however, the little inclines seemed like mountains, the rocks seemed like boulders, and I began to have charley horses in my obliques and diaphragm. I realized, I was in trouble. Next, my vision became extremely impaired. I could only see through what seemed like pin-holes and even that was very blurry. Something was dreadfully wrong. I sat. I tried to wrap my head around the fact that I only had 7 miles left at this point and I could crawl if I needed to. I did not want to stop.

The 1st aid station seemed so far away. I felt despair setting in. I had not seen anyone at all on this loop, and I allowed that to play into my fear. Maybe I was the last one on the trail? If I passed out, no one would be able to find me till daylight. But I trudged on. I prayed. I tried to see. I tried to drink. I tried to eat. My stomach was terribly upset so I reached for the pepto. I couldn't open the packages. I had no dexterity in my fingers anymore. I looked to the sky and it was so beautiful. I decided to sit again and rest for a bit. Maybe that would help. As I looked up, the millions of stars gave me reason to lie back and just observe. They were incredible. I had not seen stars in that way since I was a child. Truly a beautiful sight! Through my impaired vision, the stars seemed to be in a kaleidoscope that I didn't want to stop looking at. I lay there a bit and then, next thing I knew, I "came to". I don't know if I fell asleep or passed out. Obviously, no one had come by me because they would have had to step over me on the trail. Yes, I was laid out on the trail.
I knew at that moment I had to make it to the next aid station and drop. 6 miles from the finish. There was no way I could safely make it back to the start/finish, especially over the 2nd section of that course. I always have to remember my number one vocation. I am a mom. I can't be a good mom if I am horribly injured, or worse. The decision was made; now I just had to make it to the aid station.

I knew it was quite possible that there would be no one at the aid station as it was unmanned, but I remembered that there was a paved road leading to it, so I made up my mind to sit there until a car came by. Thankfully, there was a car at the aid station. It was dark and I wasn't sure anyone was in it. I walked up to it, and lo and behold, Brad, the RD was sitting in his car. Thank you, Lord! I asked him for a ride back. He, very sweetly, asked if I realized I only had 6 miles to go to reach the finish and I had plenty of time left. I told him what had been happening to me and he agreed to bring me back. As I got into the car, there were several runners that had come into the aid station. I am glad they didn't come across me splayed out on that trail. That could have screwed up their race too!

Brad kindly took me to the start/finish line. I was done. 50K. 8:10. He walked me to the tent and saw how horrible unsteady my gait was. Liza Howard took great care of me and we shared a bit about running, being mothers, and making the best decisions for our families in this situation. She fed me coke and asked me to try to pee. I couldn't comply. I finally convinced her to let me walk to where Mark and Erica were. She walked with me and I couldn't see very much, but I heard Mark, Erica, Stacy, and Nicholas all seem to be struck that I was back so fast. At first they thought they missed my miraculously speedy 4th loop... then they realized, I was a mess. They took good care of me. Such good care. Stacy was dealing with a migraine, yet she waited for me and tended to me on each loop I came through. Nicholas had finished his race almost 2 hours before and yet, he and Erica waited to see me come in. That's what trail running is all about. Brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it. Good people. Good races. Good times.

This race was a great race. I loved the course. I'd do it again in a heart beat. I felt so strong most of the time, I never dreamed this would end the way it did. But as in all things, there are lessons to be learned. Those lessons will come over time, but initially these are the things that have surfaced already.

1. In the 2nd loop, I thought the weather must have been cooling nicely because I wasn't sweating. No sweat=bad stuff. I sweat even when I ran Rocky in 23 degree temps.

2. I had planned to take my S-caps every 30 minutes, but for whatever reason, only took every 60 minutes. I knew better, I just didn't think this one through. I even advised other people to take their salt every 30 minutes.

3. Thinking I needed my glasses during a run is probably an indicator of something more serious coming. Take heed.

4. Drink more than I did. Eat more than I did. Seems simple enough, but I just failed this time.

I plan to go back next year. We will see how the training year unfolds. I do think my running fitness is where it needs to be. I am stronger and faster, I just made a few critical nutritional errors that I will hopefully never make again.

After some IV fluids, I seemed to be feeling better. I had been experiencing severe cramping, headaches, and what seems to be kidney pain. I was able to do some push ups, run a short 2 miles on the trail, and attend yoga class last night, but by the time I got home, the headache and kidney pain had returned. I think the rest of the week, I will run shorter runs, most of them on the treadmill, and concentrate on proper hydration.

The Dance

2011-08-26T14:31:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow I will be heading out to a dance on the trail at a nice little 60 K race called The Shoe. It will be run as a training run for Pumpkin Holler 100, but if I am to be really honest here, I have to mention that I will be pushing myself harder than a typical training run. Races just have that tendency.

I have unfinished business with this race series. Last year I DNF'd The Lake portion of the series and swore I would never go back. In sticking with my pledge never to return to that race, I picked a different one within the same Capt'n Karl series.

I am hoping to meet a time goal. I have some mental obstacles to get around. I have some physical limitations that ultimately sent me to the DNF status last time around. This race will definitely be a challenge. I pray that I finish healthy and renewed in my quest to remain joy-filled while dancing on the rocks.

My biggest challenge, I think, will be dealing with my asthma. Last time around, my heart rate hit 220 and I had medical people freaking out all around me. I will play it smarter this time. I will walk sooner or sit, or lie down. But I will not quit unless it is obviously the only thing left before significant harm is done.

My next biggest challenge will be to run my own race. Not any one else's race. I tend to get caught up in other people and their suffering on the trail. I can't leave anyone behind. It's not in my makeup. But what I have to remember is this:

1. I would never, ever, ever want anyone else to throw their race for me. I'm a big girl and I can take care of myself. Anyone else on that trail is certainly of the same mindset.

2. No one is ever going to be left alone out there. The aid stations are not that far off and I can notify the folks volunteering that someone needs help on the trail.

This seems so easy when writing it down. I hope I can keep it that simple when I am out there. Stay tuned for the report. I won't be winning any awards, but I will bring home another round of experience that can only help me become a better runner.

Invasion

2011-08-24T14:06:00.000-07:00

Reading an email from a friend today which came complete with pictures of his garage gym and then seeing Jamoosh's post about marathon widows, my framework for the day somewhat changed. How much of my running/fitness life has invaded my home, my family?

As I got down on the floor for a round of ab work, I glanced over to see this in one corner of my bedroom.

Lovingly stacked next to some books I need to sort through is a new pair of Brooks, still in their box and my push up bars.

Looking to the left from the same position on the floor, I noticed my hand weights under the bureau.

My side of the bed, a running log or two are tucked away for those late night calculations. Typically there are a large stack of books, most of which are running related, however, I recently placed them into my library, aka bookshelves in the closet.

The Music/lego room, which is currently suffering from a long, overdue cleaning, I have strategically placed my resistance bands, pull up bar and treadmill.

The cedar chest which holds tablecloths and other such linens is also the home for one of my yoga mats for use during the Jillian Michaels or P90X sessions.

Even the Suburban is not safe from the invasion. In it I have stowed away my swimming gear and gym bag, "just in case".

There are other locations throughout the house that have been taken over by fitness stuff. Master closet, Mud Room, drawers, shelves, etc. I try to be mindful of having my house look like a home, which is probably why things are tucked away everywhere. My home is also my office. It is our school. It is our domestic church. I try to reflect that most of the time.

Currently, I am in the thick of heavy training and my home does reflect this with disorganization, clutter, and chores left undone. This scenario causes me strife quite often as I do like a clean, clutter-free and organized home, but I can't train, work, plan school, and keep things spot on around here. Thankfully, my family not only understands me, they are very helpful.

I do long to have a nice garage gym and have made efforts to get it to the point that I can use it exclusively as such. Maybe this time next year, the transformation will be complete and my family can enjoy a fitness equipment free environment. But then again, there are worse thinks one could have laying around the house.

Preparation

2011-08-21T06:51:00.000-07:00

It is becoming apparent to me that as the days of life click by, I stress about so many little things that seem to be so unimportant, yet matter so much.

I have been a mom for 23 years. Since before I held my first child, I was preparing. Preparing my house to become a home, my dog to become child-friendly, my car to be safe, my finances, in order to provide. As more children have come along, I continue to prepare. Prepare them to walk, prepare for them to talk, to learn, to grow, to mature. As a family, we try to prepare one another for life. And as parents, we try to fully prepare our children to be able to go out into the world, strong, independent, faithful, honest, trustworthy, dependable, good stewards, and more.

And then the day comes. Your oldest gets married. Is she ready? She has a child. Are they ready? Are they prepared?

Or another day comes and you send the next child off to college. After being homeschooled for most of her life, is she ready, is she prepared?

A few years later, the oldest is worrying about if they are properly preparing for their child and the child that will join them early next year. And the phone call comes that their beautiful child is in the hospital. And I worry, is my daughter prepared for this? Should I run to her side and be there for her? And my heart aches. I know that God is calling me to stay at home and allow my granddaughter's parents to be the ones who are at her side. Being 5 hours away gives me reason to reflect on this. Are they prepared for this? Have we carried out our responsibility to them?

Preparation for a long and wonderful journey to another part of the world. Packing, planning, visas, money, maps, food, customs, backpacks, the right shoes, airports, buses, Euro Rail passes. Is daughter number 2 prepared beyond all of these things for her studies abroad? It is hard to know.

As we dropped one daughter off at the airport and waited for an update from the hospital from the other, I was struck with this thought:

We are in a constant state of preparation. And as parents, this is even more obvious. We look forward to the day when we can look upon our adult children and see that they are all that we have hoped they would be and more. And then the sadness hits. They ARE all that we have hoped they would be AND MORE. And they will be called to more. To new places. To new people. And I am filled with an aching, yet joy-filled heart that causes tears to flow from my eyes.

All I want to do is hold my baby who is 5 and tell him to stay just as he is, but I know that this can not be. He must be properly prepared. Prepared for me to let him go.

The Secret is Out

2011-08-13T14:27:00.000-07:00

I get questions about what I do on the trail when I am out there for hours at a time all alone....

It's been a long-kept secret that I am finally ready to divulge. I dance. Like this. You know you do too.

Here's praying the Dog Days of Summer break soon around here!

My Progressive Core Sets

2011-08-06T14:29:00.000-07:00

***Edited to add:
A year ago I began the push up challenge not being able to do one push up. I worked up to 100 push ups and now I make a point of doing 100 push up 3-4 times per week. Typically, I do 4 sets of 25 or 5 sets of 20. The following core set is what I am doing on the days I am not doing the 100 push ups.

I've really never found a core program that I absolutely can't live without. There are many good, even great ones out there, but with the amount of training I am currently doing with running, swimming, rowing, and perhaps spinning in the near future, spending another 30 - 60 mins in the weight room 3-5 times per week, or trying to vie for the DVD player and television in a home full of people, so that I can target specific muscle groups just is not feasible for me.

I have used P90X, Jillian Michaels, countless "Core workouts for runners" and various websites to try to hit my weakest areas. The problem is that many of these use more time than I can commit to them or require weights/balls/resistance bands and the like that don't fit in my purse or suitcase.

I am finding that the best way to get a good core workout in is to do it when I can. Oftentimes this is right before or after a run, after a shower, in between loads of laundry, or while waiting for one of the kids to be ready to be picked up. Sometimes I fit it in while working with my clients or if I just need a break from the computer work. My core routine needs to be quick, intense, and require no equipment except my own body weight coupled with a serving of "let's get this done!"

Over the last several weeks, I have come up with what I think will help me to achieve the fitness level I desire in the small amount of time I have during any given day to get it in.

Here is what it looks like from a basic structure:

Round 1:
Burpees (no hop, no push up)
Standard push up
Traditional crunch
Traditional plank

No rest, directly into Round 2:

Burpee with push up
Triangle push up
Oblique crunch
Side plank (star position)

30 sec rest

Round 3

Burpee with push up and hop
Push up with alternating leg raise
Opposite side oblique crunch
Opposite side Side plank (star position)

That's it. I do it as fast as I can, without compromising form, and with minimal rest in between.

I have left reps off so that this can be adopted if you choose to give it a try.
My workout today looked like this:

Round 1:
5 burpees
10 push ups
25 crunches
1 min plank

Round 2:
5 burpees with push up added in
10 triangle push ups
25 right side oblique crunches
1 min left side star plank

Rest 30 secs

Round 3:
5 Burpees with push up and hop (jump up at the end of the move)
10 push ups alternating leg raises
25 left side oblique crunches
1 min right side star plank

This is a bare minimum workout for me. I can do this every day if needed. On days when my time is EXTREMELY tight, which can be any day around here, I commit to only ONE ROUND and max it out. In that instance, I try to get in both sides of the obliques by either only doing the oblique crunches or drop the oblique crunches and add in the hip dip to the side plank, making sure to do them bilaterally. If I have more time and I want to add more reps, I do. Some days I try to max out everything the last round. Some days I will do decline push ups and/or try some one-armed push ups. I may also do the side planks with a hip dip in it. It really depends on how much time I have and what the demands of the rest of my workout schedule looks like for the day.

The most important aspect about this routine is that it is specific to what I currently need to strengthen and it can be done anywhere at anytime. All of that will help me maintain consistency.

Changes

2011-08-04T13:06:00.000-07:00

Thanks to my wonderful friend, JunieB, I have become aware of a problem with folks who would like to post to the blog, but are unable to do so because of a glitch with something-or-other-that-I-will-have-no-idea-to-even-begin-to-remotely-understand.

So, I have removed the said something-or-other, but I have enabled moderation. If you have been able to comment before, please try again and I will try to be diligent in getting the moderation done quickly. Heck, I might even take my chances and remove that allowing all creepy people and spambots have their way with me. Or my blog.

Music: Not My Taboo

2011-08-03T14:48:00.000-07:00

I'm having a bit of a coming out on my blog. I've stayed out of the discussions regarding music while running for as long as I have been running, but I can't remain silent anymore. I listen to music while I run. There. That's it. I've said it. I am "out". I not only listen to music while I run, I LOVE to listen to music while I run. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE it! Now let me explain why...

1. It's the only time that I can listen to the music I want to without someone telling me how much they don't like it, talk over it, ask me questions through it, etc, etc, etc. With all of my kids around, very rarely do I get an uninterrupted moment to think, let alone listen to my favorite tunes. For instance, I have been up and down tending to kids three times since beginning this post.

2. Music helps me steer the voices in my head. Sometimes, my head has to work through things and this usually happens while running. Again, it's my alone time. It's the way to I figure out how I really feel about something. It's how I discern many things in my life. With the physical output that running and now swimming offer me, it helps streamline my thinking so that I can work out whatever is going on in my head. Music helps here as well. When the voices in my headed are pulling me in many different directions, the music helps me to find a rhythm and that in itself offers a calming effect that relaxes me and helps to clear the mind.
Also, when running a particularly tough run, left to my own thoughts without the music, it is much more difficult to motivate myself to continue. The right music will uplift me and I can pull myself out of the funk more quickly.

3. Prayer. I pray most when running. Oftentimes, music is a prayer to me. 99% of the music I listen to is Christian music. I have a few artists that aren't but, typically, I've got some very spirit-led music directing my thoughts and heart towards God. I have had many situations resolved, prayers answered, and problems figured out while listening to music on the run. The songs speak to me. So music is a form of prayer for me.

4. Not always on. I don't listen to music at all if I am running with a friend or a group. I feel that the person I am running with should have my attention. Otherwise, why run with someone? I usually don't even bring it with me, but I will if there is a chance I will end up running on my own.
I also don't wear music on many races. Some of the longer ultras I will have it handy, but I don't wear it very much. I like to be alert to the people and activity around me.
If I am running in crowded or busy areas, or at night, safety comes first. I either turn the tunes off or take out at least one headphone. And I buy cheap headphones so that I never really block out the background noises anyway.

I completely respect those who choose not to listen to music while they run. I think it is an amazing thing that they can tune into their own happy place within themselves while they are out on the road. I know I am capable of doing this as well, but I just don't want to. I love music too much to not enjoy it when I am most able to appreciate it.

Many of you know that my favorite band is Third Day. They are a Christian Rock band with a Southern rock influence. Even as a Yankee growing up in Massachusetts, I loved Southern Rock. And Rush, which isn't Southern Rock, unless you are from Alaska. Third Day has a very distinctive sound and their music hits a place deep in my soul like no other group. Lately, their song "Slow Down" has been getting a lot of replay on the run.

I can't wait to see them in September! In preparation of their arrival, I have been listening to them almost non-stop, with the exception of a few Coldplay and Rush albums. I hope they can stand my singing at their show!

So, feel free to chime in on the music issue, but no bashing anyone...play nice!

Picture Post

2011-07-31T07:59:00.000-07:00

Erica was kind enough to share some of the wonderful pictures she captured at the race yesterday.

Fish tackles His First Tri

2011-07-30T20:48:00.000-07:00

This morning was an exciting day in our home as Fish became a Triathlete! Actually, we aren't quite sure what to call him as he was ready to be a triathlete but, because of the rain, the officials decided to cancel the bike portion of the tri for safety reasons. Since he was prepared to do the entire thing, we are calling him a triathlete, especially since he wants to register for the next one in two weeks!

It was an early rise for him, but he was ready to get his groove on! As we walked out the door, the skies opened up and a deluge overtook our town for about 45 minutes straight. Thunder, lightening, and heavy rains as we made the short drive to the race site, had both of us wondering what would transpire in the next hour or so.

As soon as we arrived, we had the privilege of running into The Best Swimming Teacher Ever, aka Erica and her awesome kiddos!

This is Fish and Miss Mini E.

Mr. Mini N.

We collected his race packet and timing chip and then headed out to the transition area as soon as the rain died down. I was a bit sad that the bike portion had been canceled as Fish and I had practiced transitioning in the front yard this week. I reassured Fish that there would be other days to ride the bike, if he decided that he wanted to do that.

We began to head to the pool to line up and saw another rainbow! This month I have seen several and was so excited to capture a few pictures such as this one.

Erica and her son, Mini N, Mark, the kids, and I, grabbed a coveted spot near the pool and stood as far out of the mud as possible.

The race started late secondary to the rain delay, but did finally get started. First we cheered for Miss Mini E! Then we waited for Fish's age group to come through and about 45 mins later we were cheering our hearts out for him!

He looked so comfortable in the water. Taking long, slow, strokes with long slow breaths. It looked to me as though he was purposely slowing himself down to pace himself. When asked about it later, he shared that he was taking the long slow breaths and strokes because, "it looked cool!" I loved his ability to enjoy the moment, not stress about the swim, and simply embrace the experience.

(Thank you, Richard, for this picture!)

After the swim, he headed into the transition area and donned his shoes for the run. It was quite muddy. Heaven for me, maybe not so much for Fish and he hasn't done any running off road.

It was scorching hot, humid, and quite brutal by 9:00 am. I knew that this was going to be one long half-mile.

He ran out strong, about half way through the run, he had to walk for a bit, but he pulled out a nice strong finish and made me one proud mom!

Late Night Long Run

2011-07-30T16:16:00.000-07:00

I had to get my long run in on Friday night this week because Fish was participating in his first ever triathlon this morning.

The run was the longest since Rocky, which in hindsight, was probably way overdue. I had 20 on the schedule and came up a bit short just for Tommy! I couldn't see my watch and in spite of adding on a bit here and there, came in at 19.22 which drives me insane. At 11:30 pm, and knowing I had a 5 am wake up call, I wasn't much up for a fight.

The run went well, only the last 2 miles were a bit of a struggle due to leg fatigue. I hydrated well, ate every hour and kept the S-caps on board. Some new tunes on the mp3 kept my mind occupied as well. The new Third Day CD and Shawn McDonald went well with the mood of my run.

I was greeted within the first 3 miles with a beautiful sunset which illuminated the sky in a fantastic pink hue. Through the clouds, a rainbow dangled in the air and gave me a reason to smile.

The run was fairly uneventful, with the exception of the two pantless guys who rode by me in the dark. One on a scooter, one on a bike, followed by two fully clothed guys, obviously making sure they were making good on a dare or a bet they lost. Both had on shirts, but were absolutely naked from the waist down. And people are afraid of trail runs?

The first loop out was 12 miles. Came back in for a fill up. The Nathan vest which had been collecting dust since February made it's appearance. I couldn't wait to strip it off. It felt wrong from the get go which is strange because it has always worked really well. After I emptied the bladder about half way, it became more comfortable, but I still opted to leave it home for the 2nd loop and carried my hand held instead.

All in all, it was a great night for a run. Ran it is 3:15. Pace approx. 10:08 using the 8/2 method.

I can't wait till the 20 milers feel like an easy run again.

What does your shoe say about you?

2011-07-26T09:58:00.001-07:00

Thresholds

2011-07-24T13:36:00.000-07:00

We were able to get away this weekend, just Mark and I. As I prepared the house, schedules for the kids, menus for their meals, and myself for an impromptu get away, I found myself frustrated with the loss of training and mileage that I was going to be experiencing. Then I found myself frustrated with myself for being frustrated about these things. My head knows that training only comes because I am given this gift by first God and then my family. Yet when trying to plot out some sort of training plan for an upcoming race, I am trying to develop and maintain a level of consistency that will put me within the threshold of being ready for the goal event.
I have been making great gains with consistency on my weekday training, yet with two getaways in the last month, my weekend running has been less than what I would like it to be. Amidst my inner pouting fest I recalled this particular scene from the movie Evan Almighty. It is my favorite scene. It is the one that speaks directly to my relationship with God.
In the scene, Evan is pleading with God, played by Morgan Freeman. Evan says, "but I had all these plans!" God gazes at Evan with a pregnant pause and then just laughs and says...."you had plans?" Yeah, that's me. Daring to explain to God my plans...
I wonder how often He laughs at me?
I settled into the thought of revising the "plan" and allow my body a bit of recovery for the week and then come back next week ready to hit the weekends with rigor over the next 8 weeks. This appeared to be quite reasonable and it seems my body agreed as every workout was a struggle to get through. From lack of energy to waning motivation to outright hamstring revolt when my legs began to cramp before hitting 2 miles. Both legs...with a vengeance. I'm sure it was just a little reinforcement to remind me of the new plan.
We arrived at the lake house Friday evening and I think both of us were a bit unsure what to do with ourselves. It wasn't till we talked about it on the way home from our trip away that we realized we had not been away together, just he and I, in over ten years. That's a long time. And with six children that we have been raising the last twenty years, we had just lost track of time.
Don't get me wrong. We have loved raising our children and spending time with our family. We have enjoyed family vacations with our immediate family as well as with our extended family, but we have not had time or made time to get away together, just Mark and I. So, when we arrived at the lake house, alone, nothing to do, no one to care for, chase after, cook for, clean up after, drive somewhere, console, encourage, etc, etc, etc, we really did not know how to behave.
We headed out for some dinner and supplies and then settled down for the night catching a great movie from the Red Box, The King's Speech. We had not seen it yet, (seriously, who has time to watch movies these days??) and we really enjoyed it. For some reason we also rented Rango. I guess we had to feel like we had one for the kids too...
Saturday had us up and out early to take care of the nice nail that decided to impale our tire. Thankfully, it was easily repaired and we continued with our plans to explore the Big Thicket.
What an amazing place! We took in a beautiful 3 mile hike in the heat of the day, and thanks to the canopy of the forest, we had quite a bit of shade cover. It was so nice to spend time doing nothing together. Matthew Kelly refers to it as carefree timelessness. It is important to have this with your kids, and I am convinced now, it is just as important if not more important to have this with the one you love.
The rest of the day we spent sipping coffee and reading books. This may not seem like a big deal to most people, but to us, this is something we have never done during daylight hours together. To sit and to read together. This was a new threshold for us. We were both in two different worlds, yet sitting right next to each other, enjoying the solitude and yet, not feeling alone.
Mark read Laura Ingram's new book, Of Thee I Zing. Pretty funny read. I dove into a book sent to me as a gift earlier this year from a good friend. Marshall Ulrich's Running on Empty was an excellent read that I pulled several things from. Somehow it was perfectly timed to this time in my life.
Ulrich makes it obviously clear that despite all of his accomplishments, and there are so many amazing ones that it makes my head spin, his one regret is that it came at the expense of his relationships with those he loves/loved.
His run across America was truly inspirational, moving, and enlightening. I was captivated the entire book reading about his journey. And my heart ached for him when the struggles of life hit him head on.
What I took away most from reading his journey was this. No matter what, no matter how much I love to run, to be out in the woods, to be away from "the world", I can not let that come before the people in my life who mean the most to me. My family will always come before my need to run.
I also came away from his book with a renewed commitment to running. Yes, I just said that my family will always come first. This, in turn, places the challenge of properly scheduling my training and races with my vocation as wife and mother.
I have managed to do a fairly decent job of this thus far, so I believe that most of the changes that will be made will be internal. Having a better mind set and remaining flexible with my training especially if it has to go "off plan" for some reason.
I have written about this topic before. Yet, here I am again sorting through it all. Obviously, I haven't perfected it. Doubt I ever will. I will try to embrace it all as part of the bigger journey in my life. The journey that will hopefully lead me to the person He is calling me to be.

Training Update

2011-07-18T20:58:00.000-07:00

I've been able to get a few solid weeks of training in over the last few weeks. Feeling strong, pushing through to that next level of "fitness" that I hope to carry to the start line in October.

I've really enjoyed delving more into swimming and Yoga. I know people have told me time and time again that I should incorporate both into my regime, and I finally have. Trying to juggle those with the higher mileage is proving to be a bit of a challenge, but because we are not schooling right now, I've only got to worry about pool time with the kids, laundry, curriculum planning, laundry, seeing clients, laundry, grocery shopping, laundry, and working out, oh, and the occasional load of laundry. Another aspect of training which I have more faithfully adopted are consistent overall strengthening workouts. From 120 push ups at a time, to Jillian Michaels Abs and Workout DVDs, I'm trying to keep it fresh and keep it doable. I have rather enjoyed getting down and dirty with the rowing machine at the Y. All in all, I feel much more balanced, if you will, as an athlete.

Summer around these parts is very hot, so outdoor training has to be timed properly else, one could sustain a serious case of heat exhaustion. I have been care to either run early in the am, or later in the evening to avoid this condition. Even after the sun sets, temps are still in the mid to upper 80s. I can't even pretend to know how this is possible.

Last summer, I missed several opportunities to run because I did not want to run on the treadmill. The few times I tried, I loathed it. I dubbed those runs "Dreadmill" runs, as they were definitely something I dreaded.

Now, having a bit more experience under my belt, I understand that a run on the treadmill is better than no run at all, especially if I want to be in shape to run in October this year. Therefore, from now on, my Dreadmill runs will be recoined, Happymill runs! Afterall, shouldn't I be "Happy" to run no matter what?

Run with Joy in your heart and a smile on your face!

Get Away

2011-07-18T07:02:00.000-07:00

A few random candid shots from the kids' perspective over our little time away last weekend.

This is the new definition of plank. I don't get the appeal.

I have no idea.

Still no clue.

Getting hammered in Uno by Boo...again.

t

Fish, in the midst of a Midnight Marshmallow Battle to the Death!

He used to be a good kid...

This should help get him back on track. If not, Hannah, the dog is ready to take control of the situation.

Lem went with bangs to help people be able to tell the difference between them.

I'm feeling shorter and more pale by the minute.

Boo getting ready to shoot some slobbery marshmallows at his siblings.

Speaking of Social Networks

2011-07-13T20:20:00.000-07:00

Great Commercial I love how perfectly timed this was for me.

Life is More than a Status Update

2011-07-11T08:49:00.000-07:00

Some of you may have noticed that my profile has disappeared from the world of Facebook. Most of you probably haven't, and that's okay too.

I thought I'd give a brief explanation as to why I am on a hiatus from the FB community.

When I created my account a few years ago, I really had no desire to delve into that world. I was merely trying to keep up with my high school daughter and her friends. I very rarely ever checked the thing and when I did, I usually didn't have a clue as to what to do with it. It didn't make any sense to me.

Then the FB bug hit me when I began to connect with people from each aspect of my life, running, church, hometown, high school, work, college, etc. Soon, I was in deep. Really, really deep. I really do like Facebook. It's a great way to communicate, keep in touch, share pictures, and my favorite part about it is the way that friends who are in need of prayer can ask and receive it instantly. Of late, there have been tragic situations that I have been able to drop to my knees for immediately and I am so thankful for that.

For me, however, among all of the positives that Facebook can offer, there have been some negatives. The most concerning thing from my perspective, is the amount of time I am able to waste while imposing the deadly sin of procrastination upon each day. Though I have wrestled with trying to balance it into my daily life, last night, while on my run, I heard loud and clear, "GET OFF FACEBOOK!" When I hear things like that, I tend to listen. I don't know if this means I won't get back on it again, but for now, I am taking a break from it. I suppose the fact that I feel I have to even explain this demonstrates how ridiculous all of this is.

A few things went through my mind about my adventure on FB. I think it helped to solidify my decision to follow through with the decision.

1. I joined FB to keep up with my children, but has it made me a better mother?
2. I reconnected with old friends, made new friends, and introduced people to one another, but has it made me a better friend?
3. I used the cute little "Married" indicator that FB provides, but has it made me a better wife?
4. I have read inspirational quotes, the scriptures, and stories of faith and love. I have even posted some of my own, but has it made me a better Christian?

To all of these things, I would have to say, "No". Sure, it may have added a bit to a given day along the way, but in the big picture of life, I would have to admit, that Facebook, and more correctly, the way I use Facebook, does not help me to become the things I am striving to be. So for that reason, I am now listed in the Facebook files as "deactivated".

Life is more than what I am thinking in any given moment in a day. It is more than a status update. I hope to live my life that reflects this.

Blast from the Past

2011-07-05T21:40:00.000-07:00

A post from my old blog has me realizing how much I miss real blogging.

I may need to begin a blog resurrection. Remember how video killed the radio star? Well, Facebook killed the blogger.

The Tri I Tried

2011-06-27T16:59:00.000-07:00

I had the wonderful experience of volunteering for the Ironman Texas back in May. It was an amazing event and I stood in complete awe at the men and women who bravely took on the challenge set before them.

Being a hometown event, I knew many athletes that participated in the race and had a great time being there to cheer them on, encourage them, and support them by way of the aid station I was assigned to.

Many of my running friends have mentioned to me that I should consider competing in such an event. I have said repeatedly that there is NO WAY, I would ever do a Tri, never mind an IRONMAN! When pressed for the reason why, my answer is simple...the swim.

I can swim. I can't swim well or with much endurance at all. And in my mind, I had decided that there is no way I could ever do that "tri" thing. Then something occurred to me. I was making a decision to allow my fear to make my decisions for me.

When I think back over the last 4.5 years, I can recall thinking, "there is no way that I could ever run a mile, never mind that David Fun Run (a local 5K)". But I did enjoy spinning classes until they became frustrating to me. I didn't enjoy sitting in an air conditioned room anymore. I wanted to be outside, enjoying God's world. So I made a decision. I promised myself that if I could take up running for 3 months, an activity I knew I could never do because of my exercise induced asthma, I would buy myself a bike and enjoy the out-of-doors more.

Why this thought came to my mind, I do not know. But within 3 weeks, I completed my first mile, then at 5 weeks, my first 5K, then at 8 weeks, my first 5 mile race. (It should be mentioned that I do NOT recommend this plan to anyone...I was an idiot!)

I became hooked on running and found great joy in it! I still do! I am challenged by my own progress and look forward to continued growth within this discipline. But I had to make the decision to not let my fear of running, my fear of my asthma, make the decision for me. I jumped in, albeit somewhat reluctantly some days, and gave it my best. I have been able to do many things I never could have imagined I would do 5 years ago. I have learned about inner strength and determination and even more, I have learned about trusting in God's plan for my life. Yes, I do believe that God has a plan and helps me to discover it and carry it out through running.

So, back to May 22, 2011. I caught myself being entrapped by the fear of swimming in a tri. I knew that I could not allow this to be the reason I didn't do the tri. Fear is lack of faith and I am doing all that I can to live my faith, so fear is no longer an option.

I began discussing, quietly, very, very quietly, the possibility of doing a sprint tri. I began swimming more and more and am beginning to feel a bit more comfortable in the water, though not THAT comfortable.

Then about 2 weeks ago, Richard asked me if I would like to participate in the Y Freedom Tri in Pearland. He offered to have us do this race as a relay team, he doing the hard parts, (the swim and bike) and me running the 3 miler. He thought that by me participating, I might feel more comfortable in signing up to do one on my own someday.

Turns out, he was right! The race was not at all scary, though I will admit I am still very intimidated by the swim. I am no longer in fear of the race. I had a great time watching everyone compete, learned much about transitioning, and gained some insight into what it would be like to have to pace myself through such an event.

Richard signed us up as Team Pax. We had a blast and even came in 1st place for the Mixed Relay Division! And what's more, we even met George Washington!

So, is there a Tri in my future? Probably. Not sure when, but if it comes up, I won't be so eager to say "No!"

RTW 5K PR

2011-06-11T08:50:00.000-07:00

Ran the RTW this morning. An unusual event for me as I don't seem to ever feel like I can afford to miss the distance runs when training for the longer races.

I needed to give this a go since it has been 3 years since my last real effort at one with 26:30 being my PR.

Today was a nice Texas summer morning. Humidity, heat, and sunshine accompanied us on the course today. The dappled sunlight on the tree-covered pathways makes this 5K a nice little run.

Best part of the morning was having Fish with me, being watched over by Hannah. She is a good dog who in days gone by would have loved to have run the 3 miles with me. Her hips are 11 now, and that just isn't in her ability anymore without a lot of pain for her. I can see in her eyes that she misses it, but she was happy just to be there. Fish was inspired by watching the runners, young and old, cross that finish line! He mentioned that he might want to start running. My dilemma? How to encourage without pushing...

Second best part was seeing Ken gladly present his grandchildren with their "prizes" for beating their grandpa in a 5K. I believe the children were 7 and 9 years old, and came in at 34 mins. Ken was very excited to pay out those 100.00 awards, but probably not as excited as the kids were in receiving them!

I was a little short of my goal time, 25:00, coming in at 25:12, but overall fairly pleased with my results considering I have done little to no speed work at all.

I have a good baseline to build from for this running season. Let's see where it takes me!

Zone

2011-06-08T20:31:00.000-07:00

After taking a few days to think about what my goals really are right now, talking with a trusted running mentor, and throwing myself into the workouts without abandon, I am starting to feel that I am getting back into the zone.

The runs and cross training is enjoyable, even in the miserable heat, and I look forward to getting a little something in every day, even if it less than what my "plan" suggests it should be.

I know it is miserably hot out there right now, but I really enjoy the summer training. The sweating and struggling makes me feel like I am accomplishing something.

I've added in a lot of cross training this season. Swimming, yoga, core work, push-ups, etc. I do what I can when I can. I will spread it out over the day, doing push-ups between laundry loads and car pools, planks before and after a shower, swimming while the kids are in swim lessons, etc. It's been a fun challenge to figure out how to make it all work rather than resent not being able to get the written plan in.

Looking forward to some longer runs in the coming weeks. Totally enjoying the moment!

Training Plans

2011-06-02T10:01:00.000-07:00

It seems as though I have written this post before. Many times. Perhaps only in my mind.

I sat down about 2 weeks ago and planned out my "training plan" from now until race day. It was pretty. It was perfect. It fit my schedule and seemed as though all would go well. Then as usually happens, things changed.

First hit to the plan, my family has decided that they are now ALL going to begin working out! While this is a great thing, it makes juggling my workouts a bit more challenging. I have been praying that the family would take this step and want to support their efforts, so I made up my mind to fit my training in around their workouts. I think we all know how that usually goes.

Second hit has been a nasty, unrelenting virus that I can't seem to shake. I'm on day 9 of this thing. I finally hit the Dreadmill last night to test out my lungs and they held up well. At least in an air-conditioned, easy-paced run they did well.

I planned to get up and hit the hills this morning, but the family decided they wanted to work out this morning, so I figured I could fit it in later. Now it is a million degrees outside and if I want to run, it will be unbearably warm. Or it's back to the dreadmill at the Y. Not sure which way I want to go with this just yet. I'm leaning towards the million degrees...

Really beginning to wonder if a plan is even worth the effort. Maybe the plan should be as simple as Run. Run as much as you can as often as you can. Try to hit some hills. Try to do some speed. Balancing life and running isn't such an easy thing.

Lessons from the Garden

2011-05-18T15:22:00.000-07:00

A few things I've learned so far, 6 weeks into our Backyard Project:

If a seasoned gardener suggests a soil mixture to you, don't try to cut corners, heed his advice.
The year you start a garden, expect a drought.
Weeds, though green, have no place in the garden.
Chicken poop smells worse than death and dogs eat it.
I can not grow squash, cilantro, nor apparently much else well except
Grass. I can grow grass.
Perseverance. These plants will not die...at least not yet.
Smart people start with one or two vegetable beds. I am not smart.

I am sure there will be more lessons from the garden. Hopefully they aren't as painful as the ones I've learned so far.

Strawberry Fields Forever

2011-04-16T22:31:00.000-07:00

The kids and I had the opportunity to go to a local berry farm yesterday. We came home with 16 pounds of strawberries all picked in under 30 minutes! At $2.00 a pound, I felt it was a bargain, not too mention completely delicious!

Once home, we sorted through the berries picking the ripest ones to either eat immediately or make into jam. I've only made jam once, many years ago, and the friend who came to make it with me provided all of the needed supplies.

I began investigating how, exactly, to properly can and became increasingly more anxious by the moment regarding the amount of work involved, not to mention the expense in purchasing the utensils, pots, and other odds and ends to perform the task correctly.

Another friend of mine mentioned "freezer jam". I have never heard of such a thing so I spent a little time investigating on the internet. It seemed simple enough, but in my mind I was fairly certain that the jam would not be as good as a traditional jam since the work involved in preparing freezer jam was almost nothing.

I was dead wrong. I found a recipe on Pinch My Salt and trusted that things would turn out ok. Not only did the jam come out beautifully, the little boys and I had a wonderful afternoon together.

I haven't tasted berries this heavenly since I was a child.

I love my helpers!

Chefs Fish and Boo

Best Friends

"Can I stir, Mommy?"

Our first batch of Strawberry Freezer Jam!

Even if the jam hadn't come out well, this was an afternoon of memories I hope to never forget.

Mish Mash of Progress

2011-04-12T11:34:00.000-07:00

Fitness and Nutrition is off to a better start this week. The allergy season has wreaked havoc on me and my family. It's not pleasant when the nicest time of the year with regards to weather is also the most dreadful time of year due to the pollen.

I have been trying out my new shoes, the Ghost 3, and am pretty pleased thus far. I have been running in a motion-control shoe since I first started running four years ago. I have always run in the Cascadia Trail shoe, however, which is a neutral shoe. I could not figure out why the neutral shoe was great on the trail, but not on the road. After having more pain in my legs than I would leg this past year, I decided to try the neutral shoe and see what happens.

I don't notice a fluffy cloud when I place my foot into the shoe. I am glad for this as I want to really feel what my body is doing while it is in motion. I feel how I am moving my legs and the work involved in lifting the knee and the foot from the ground.

I have been having some burning in my calves, especially when I run hills, but this usually goes away if I am running longer than 5 miles.

I have also been attending Yoga classes at the Y. I've enjoyed the stretching and the feeling of relaxation once the class is finished. It is not easy by any means. I find I am sweating quite a bit to maintain the poses. I don't know all of the names yet, but that really isn't of great importance to me right now. Perhaps some day.

Our garden is doing well. It's been 10 days since we planted everything and we have already begun to witness some changes.

Boo's 1st Strawberry!

Trying to learn not only a method of gardening, but also everything about gardening all at once is quite a daunting task. I'm trying to not become compulsive about this, rather, just let nature take it's course and teach me along the way.

The kids and I planted some seeds indoors as well. We are hoping these sprout soon so that we can add them to our garden.


Check back in 2 weeks to see if they've sprouted

My Lenten sacrifices are going well. I have only checked FB once or twice and that was on a Sunday. I do get some of the messages from FB on my phone, so if it is of an urgent nature I will respond. I am not checking into FB, so it's not really cheating, right? Truthfully, giving up FB wasn't as hard as I anticipated. I stopped thinking in "status update" mode about 10 days into Lent. I guess I didn't realize how caught up I was in it. I do miss it a tad when I am trying to distract myself from other things, but really, I don't even know if I want to pick that sacrifice back up again.

My other sacrifice was to give up everything except tap water to drink. The first thing that came to mind was COFFEE! I love my coffee. I didn't think I could give it up. I gave it up several years ago and I was miserable during the detox process. I had the headache from you-know-where, and I was quite unpleasant to live with for about a week.

This clean, clear, fresh water is a blessing.

This time was different. I did not experience a headache at all. It was easy to give up. The first week I hardly noticed it being gone. I was drinking plenty of water and that felt good. Now, though, I find I am really craving it. I miss it so much. This is truly a sacrifice for me. And when the cravings hit, I offer them up to God. It is seems like such a silly, small thing to offer as a penance. It is a sacrifice made in love, and hopefully that is pleasing to Him. I would not be truthful if I didn't say, I do look forward to that cup of java on Easter morning!

The End

2011-04-09T09:40:00.000-07:00

I've reached the end of my running funk this week. 9 weeks post Rocky, I think enough excuses have been made. I've recovered fairly well, endured a few illnesses, and put on a few pounds. I wouldn't mind the pounds if they were from muscle gain, but alas, not running does not do much for developing muscle.

So some good old fashioned flab has reared it's ugly head. The battle is on. I've run twice this week which is pitiful. Being tired won't count as a reason to skip a run or a workout anymore.

I registered for an inaugural 100 miler this week. The Pumpkin Holler Hunnerd. Should be a great time with some great people.

Six months to get back to where I need to be for this race. I hope to be stronger than I was for Rocky.

Back Yard Project 2011

2011-04-03T11:50:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago, we made the decision to take our deck that was close to 25 years old down. It had become more and more work to maintain and really was no longer attractive. A call was made to our handyman neighbor and with the help of Foo and Fish, the deck was dismantled.

You can see the condition of the deck in these pictures as well as the overgrown status of much of our yard plants.

The dead vines are made up of trumpet vine and passion flower vine. They did an amazing job attracting butterflies and hummingbirds. As soon as the deck was out, however, I pulled down all of the overgrowth and dead plants. I am not sure how much will return this year.

When pulling up the deck, we discovered a very large infestation of carpenter ants. The deck's integrity was severely compromised and we did not regret our decision to remove it.

What remained in the yard after the deck was gone was a nice plot of dirt. The kids dug up the cemented in posts, no small job. KC and Hannah (our dogs) were besides themselves. They didn't quite know what to make of the situation.

The next few weeks we worked on pulling up plants, transplanting bushes such as azaleas, roses, gardenias, monkey grass, and more. We got rid of all the overgrowth and thinned out the yard nicely. We had hoped to put in a natural stone patio, but after pricing it out, we decided our best choice would be to put in grass and a vegetable garden, something I've always wanted to do, but never had a space with adequate sunlight to be successful. Since the deck was now gone, we had plenty of room and plenty of sunshine.

We also worked on the front yard as we planned to get everything done at the same time. The next several weekends were spent preparing both the front and backyards for mulch, dirt, gardens, and grass.

I really had not given the vegetable garden much thought past the idea of having a raised bed. I sent a quick email out to Welshrunner inquiring about his recent experience into the realm of suburban farming.

He sent a few suggestions and then reminded me that he had been following many of the concepts of Square Foot Gardening. I took his advice and proceeded to spend the rest of the day well into the wee hours of the next day reading everything I could online about the process. I was hooked on the idea and decided to make my plan to follow much of the same ideas.

Thursday and Friday were exciting as the grass, dirt, and mulch were delivered. Foo started putting the mulch out and when Mark got home, he started as well.

Saturday morning, I headed to Lowes for the remainder of our supplies. The rest of the day consisted of good, old-fashioned hard work. All of the children helped and by the end of the day, they all appreciated their new backyard.

Here are a few glimpses of the day in progress.

Some of the supplies.

By the time I returned, the team had removed all of the overgrown bushes from the front of this window and transplanted many of them to other areas in the front yard. This was great because we lost several plants this winter.

They had also laid most of the sod leaving an area for the vegetable beds.

To see grass outside of my kitchen window warms my soul.

KC and Hannah enjoying the new dog beds, while Lem plants some of the veggies.

Mr. Mellow Yellow posing for his herbs.

Fish and Boo have 3' X 3' boxes.

Better view of the 3 X 3 box. We made them deeper to accommodate potatoes at some point.

Foo and Lem have 4' X 4" boxes.

Hannah is in Heaven.


KC is just looking for trouble.

Our new Mary Garden with plenty of room for hummingbirds, song birds, and butterflies!

A view of how all the beds look against the back of the house. St. Francis is watching over us.

I will hopefully post pictures as the gardens progress. I can't put into words how satisfying it is to see the family all work together to get the yard in order. Growing our own produce will be a great experience as well. Looking forward to our home grown bounties!

Consider This

2011-03-28T12:21:00.000-07:00

So Much for That!

2011-03-24T13:02:00.000-07:00

I had every intention of hitting the training heavier this week, or at least with more consistency. However, mother nature decided to get nasty with me and has hit me with a nasty case of allergies.

I feel completely drained, sore throat, headache, and pretty much yucky all over. Not conducive to working out by any stretch of the imagination. And truthfully, having nothing on the schedule till October makes my motivation a bit underwhelming.

If there is ever a time to run in Houston, this is it. Perfect temps, low humidity, (usually), and longer sunny days. Yet, the double edged sword has revealed itself in the form of pollen. Lots of it.

I am flirting with the idea of a race on July 1st, a possible 50 miler at midnight. This breaks two newly established rules for me:

1. No racing after May 1
2. No midnight races.

Rules are made to be broken, right?

I've been struggling a bit this week with my continued "retreat high" that I hoped to hold onto a bit longer. I believe this is why the Saints are saints, and I am yet to be one. Is my faith so little, so weak, that in the slightest physical discomfort or tiniest inconveniences I become frustrated, irritated, and not so pleasant to be around? Is this how I show Him that I love Him? That I am so blessed that He loves me? I think not.

Today, I found myself yearning to spend time with Him and in His word. Of course, the scriptures I read were exactly what I needed to hear today. Funny how that works, eh?

I am focusing my heart on Him. My eyes on His. Maybe I'll even make a bit of progress along the way.

Tomorrow being the Feast of the Annunciation is perfectly planned. Because of her Fiat, we have a Savior. Lord, let me allow you to do your will in my life. Break that willful spirit that gets in my way so much of the time. Help me to relinquish the grip I tend to hold tightly to those things that belong to you anyway. I am such a poor example of faith at times. Overcome me, Lord. Overcome me.

Better Week

2011-03-21T08:28:00.000-07:00

In spite of my back continuing to protest, my running was a bit more frequent last week. I had intended to run on Sunday, but duties from the home-front, and my back pain won out and I spent the day cooking, cleaning, and grocery shopping.

This is week four of the back pain. We thought perhaps our box spring was not helping the situation so we picked a new one up. We should have done this when we bought our mattress in May, but we were trying to be frugal and really didn't think we "needed" a new one. I mean, a box spring is a box spring, is a box spring, right?

Wrong. I've noticed that I've been rolling downhill into the center of the bed for a few months now. My sleepless nights were becoming more frequent again, and my back pain was not relenting.

Since Saturday, I have slept better than I have in quite some time. In fact, our youngest came into bed with us last night and I never knew. I can certainly confirm that 7 hours of quality sleep versus 2 or 3 hours of intermittent sleep really does make a difference during the waking hours of the day.

This week of training will become more like normal. I intend to incorporate some new things that will give opportunity for strengthening and endurance and still keep increasing the mileage. I'd like to be back to my base of 40 - 50 miles/week very soon.

Last weekend, I spent away on retreat. I thought it would be good to get away and spend some quiet time reflecting on where I am right now. Little did I know that the Holy Spirit had great things planned for me and the weekend was more than I have ever experienced before. Being the first week of Lent, I felt a bit guilty coming off of the retreat feeling like it was already Easter.

The rest of the week I spent processing what exactly happened and how it would impact my journey. There were several things that came up this week that were highly unusual and I became suspect that much of what I was experiencing might have been a deeper challenge of my new found peace. Aside from a few small bumps along the way, I felt the presence of God with me in a new way and my peace not only stayed with me, but it also seemed to grow.

The real contest for me now, one week post retreat, is to continue to feel the peace of Christ. To see with the eyes that He revealed to me while on retreat. To hear with His ears; to love with His heart. As I found myself becoming irritated while waiting 15 mins in line at the grocery store yesterday, the old anxiety and loss of compassion tried to eek away. Thankfully, I was able to call on Him to show me again how to look upon the situation and find the meaning in it all.

For it is not in the big things that I typically fall, it is in the small things. And once I begin to let those tiny moments of holiness slip away, the big things become more difficult to face and my obedience to His will grows weaker.

As I read this morning,
" Only the cross of Jesus Christ and His victory over sin can free us from the tyranny of malice, hatred, revenge, and resentment and give us the courage to overcome evil with good"

And while I realize that treating others as Christ would have us do is to show His love for them, in the end, its result is a change in my heart that blesses me in ways that are unimaginable.

These are the eyes which look upon me and my sin. How is it that I can look at others with anything less than this gaze?

End of Recovery

2011-03-17T20:45:00.000-07:00

It's been over 5 weeks since Rocky and the time for recovery has come to a close. I was mentally ready to run right after Rocky, but gave my legs two weeks to rest. When I started back, I realized that I had an issue with my knee and then my foot. Two weeks after that, my back began to act up and hasn't relented thus far.

It doesn't seem to hurt while running, but as soon as I stop, the pain returns. I'm fairly certain that tight hamstrings are the culprit. I've been stretching more than ever, but still, the tightness remains.

It is hard to be motivated to run when I have nothing on the race schedule. I will be registering for a marathon and another 100 miler, but nothing between now and October. I will need to find a race or two to inspire my training.

A few differences for training this time around. I won't worry so much about the mileage ( I say this now, hold me to it closer to the fall!) but I will be focusing on hills, (treadmill running, ack), strengthening of my upper body, and cross-training. I need to find a better balance so that my body, especially my legs, don't feel as trashed after the next 100. I don't want to take another 5 weeks off, if I can help it.

Tonight's run was painful for the first 3 -3.5 miles. My legs were not happy about running. At mile 4 or so, they loosened up and I felt that familiar pace that my body thrives on. I love when all the parts start working together and the run seems effortless. It's been awhile since I have felt that and I was very happy tonight was the night it returned.

Looking forward to getting back to the training with a new perspective. I really wasn't sure I'd ever want to do another 100. I thought it would just be a box to check and then I could go back to "normal" running, whatever that is. Alas, my heart was won over by the challenge and I am looking forward to embracing the next one. My goals won't necessarily be for time, but rather, to feel better during the run and recover more quickly so that I can tack a few more races on this fall.

All of this will take careful planning and execution of my training plan. Consistency will be crucial. Morning workouts will be more commonplace if I am to get in the strengthening and cross-training. We made the decision to re-join the Y this month. This should prove to be helpful in many ways.

Rich's Music Still Speaks to our Hearts

2011-03-17T09:35:00.000-07:00

Two a Days

2011-03-08T19:37:00.000-08:00

Bet you thought I was talking about workouts! Nope... blog posts! Two today! Bill was right. The blogging helped.

It got me out there tonight. I slogged through a 60 minute run. The legs were feeling quite dead for the first half of the run, then they started loosening up. Humidity has returned as the day grows longer. I enjoyed getting home from my run before nightfall.

Let's see what tomorrow brings.

For Bill

2011-03-08T13:15:00.000-08:00

Seems folks have been missing my blogging. So this one is for Bill.

I've been a lump for exactly 16 days. Well, I did run one day last week, but then didn't get out again the rest of the week.

My guilt is mounting, yet my motivation is lacking. I need to find a race to run, but nothing is doable till the fall. I've been craving chocolate, eating Limon chips, and drinking lots of coffee.

And I've been organizing.

I hope to get back to it soon. I rejoined the Y to try some different training things. Basically, I'm a lump. But, I've already mentioned that.

It's not that I'm not busy, I'm just not getting much done.

Now, feel free to kick me in the pants!

Grace

2011-02-23T13:05:00.000-08:00

Today I am completely overwhelmed by His grace. There is no way to describe how deeply He has touched me today, as I am at a loss for words. The song, "How He Loves Us", would sum it up best.

I am on my knees, breathing this all in, praying I can fully accept His love, His grace, His providential care. I don't feel at all worthy. I know I am not worthy, but I hear His gentle whisper in my ear, "Do you hear me now?"

Lord, I hear you. I love you. I am not worthy to receive you, but only say the word, and I shall be healed.

Project Simplify

2011-02-22T09:28:00.000-08:00

I thought perhaps I would share some of my life outside of running for a bit. I love organizing and simplifying and every year I look forward to less stuff and more simplicity.

This year I am taking on a more "formal" approach after reading Organized Simplicity from Simple Mom.net. It's a great read, although it really doesn't give me any new information, it does present it in a fresh way and gives me great inspiration to delve into the organizing waters once again.

I will begin Project Simplify on March 7th. I'd love some company! I hope to post pictures of my progress along the way. Don't laugh!

Vacuum Escapades

2011-02-22T08:47:00.000-08:00

Taper and recovery weeks are the most dangerous around my house. This is the perfect time for my clutziness and somewhat quirky obsessiveness to rear it's ugly head.

I have done pretty well the last few weeks, with only starting one major project. I hired someone to rip out the backyard deck which was beyond repair. Now I have a big muddy mess in the backyard and an imagination that is running wild. The only thing holding me back from my dream yard is my stinking checkbook...

Whilst the handyman and my sons were busy ripping out the said carpenter-ant-infested deck, I began a cleaning frenzy inside the house. I am about to embark on my quarterly, if-it-isn't-nailed-down, it's-going-in-the-trash, organizing spree. The festivities began in the kitchen, cleaning out drawers, rearranging the cupboards, etc. Then it was time to vacuum. I hate the vacuum. I hate the noise. It is offensively loud and does nothing for my sense of peace. Sweeping is my thing. I could sweep all day. It's quiet and effective. It is hypnotic and I like being under the influence... But I had a student coming for a session, so I resorted to Mark's favorite household appliance, the vacuum. (Anyone who knows my husband, knows his true love is the vacuum... I just happen to come with it!)

As I furiously wing The Shark around, I am pleased that I am almost finished and then, WHAM! My toe eats the corner of the cupboard. Yeah. Thanks. Foreign words flying all over the house. And me on my knees in the middle of the floor.

After a few minutes spent trying to catch my breath, I gather my composure, insist to the children that I did NOT say words like that, and then finish the job. Stupid vacuum.

Now I am left with the knowledge that I ran a 100 miler and had not one blister or foot problem. Leave me to my own devices at home with The Shark, and I end up with a foot I can't run on...I wonder how well duct tape would work on it?

I guess since my runs will be on hold for a day or two, it will give me more time to ponder some more projects. I've been considering flip-flopping the appliances in my kitchen and breaking down a wall or two to make a larger gathering space... I wouldn't need a vacuum for that!

Post Rocky Evaluation

2011-02-17T22:30:00.000-08:00

I've had about 10 days to process the experience of Rocky, the good and the not-so-good.

Recovery continues to go well as I rest, eat, and enjoy the easy-going training schedule. I continue to have pain in my right knee, but it isn't unbearable and actually felt pretty good today on my longest run since the race.

I have started scouting out a few races to consider for this year and should be deciding fairly soon on which ones I will commit to.

After each race I complete, I try to come away with lessons learned for next time. This post will be boring to most everyone as it really only pertains to what worked and what didn't specific to my experience.

TRAINING:
What went well -
I know without a shadow of a doubt that the 8/2 method of run/walking was the best advice and best way for me to train for this race. I will continue to train this way for all ultra events. I understand that I will most probably never "win" a race with this method, but honestly, that is not why I run. Being able to return to running shortly after participating in these races is a possibility because this run/walk method allows for a quicker recovery.
I became quite accustomed to the back-to-back runs this past year. I enjoy them most of the time and I think that they go a long way in securing the kind of endurance that one needs to run the longer distances.
Hills. The minimal hills that are available to us here in this area were hills that I tried to run most every single training run. At first, they gave me reason to walk, but now, they are easy to navigate and don't pose much of a difficulty for me. Admittedly, these "hills" are laughable if you aren't from this flatlander paradise, but it is all we have around here. Maybe one day I will have a treadmill and can work on some inclines.

What can be improved upon-
I would love to find a place to train that could incorporate more of a rocky terrain. I DNF'd two races this year due to the rocks that I had no practice running on. If I decide to run these again this year, I will have to be able to find the time to train on similar terrain or I will not register for them.

Core and Upper Extremity strength. I worked fairly hard on these areas over the summer, but once the holidays hit and the mileage was much higher, I let these things go. I am stronger than I have ever been, but I am still not satisfied with these areas. I need to balance my schedule a bit more so that I can be sure to not skip the workouts needed.

Cross Training, Stretching, Yoga. Again, earlier in the training season, I was doing more of this, but as the summer came to a close, I seemed to pull away from biking and swimming and focused mostly on getting the mileage in. Then the Yoga and Stretching went out the window. It seemed to take too much time away from family to do these things after spending 4 hours running. I believe better scheduling will allow more success in this area.

NUTRITION:
Through the training season, I tweaked my daily diet and became primarily plant-based. This wasn't too difficult during daily life, but on the run, proved to be quite the challenge. Even more, eating plant-based at races was very difficult. Eating on the road is a nightmare as restaurants in Texas seem to live and die by cheese. It's on everything. Salads are pre-made with cheese and bacon thrown in.
I also discovered that I have been having issues with gluten for years. Taking that out of the diet was worse than giving up butter and cheese. And I never thought I could do that!
By mid-August I was severely anemic and had to readjust everything from training to my diet again.
I agreed to eat some non-plant based foods to help my iron levels, began the iron supplements, and started to feel better.
I am still not 100% plant-based, but I am working my way there again. Mark worries about me if I don't eat some other forms of protein and if it helps him feel better about me training this hard, I will eat a portion off my plan from time to time.
One positive that has come from all of this is that I learned to carry what I need during training runs as well as races. I don't rely on the aid stations to provide what I need, but love it when they have it. I gave up all sports drinks resorting to only water. I drink coconut water as needed on the run. Making sure I take S-caps on a regular basis ensure an adequate supply of electrolytes.
Ultimately, I do need to maintain a clean diet that is primarily plant-based, making sure that I take in enough calories, enough iron, and enough protein to support the hard training that ultras require.

WHAT I LEARNED ABOUT MYSELF
Most of what I discovered is already in my race report, but since writing it, I've discovered a few more things. One thing I've learned is that I really, really, really love running. I knew that I liked it. I knew that it helped me to center myself and gave me time to listen to that innervoice that gets drowned out during daily life. I knew that it gave me time to talk to God and even more importantly, listen to Him.
What I didn't quite get though, is how much I really love what I do. I love how my body feels when I am pushing it to another level. I love the feel of the breath entering and exiting my lungs. I love the way that the cadence of my gait sets my mind into a meditative state that brings about a sense of peace and calm that isn't duplicated anywhere else except in the adoration chapel, before the Blessed Sacrament.

I've also learned that I have been blessed to be running in a community where we all support one another. We may not all see eye to eye on all issues, but we respect one another, we celebrate each other's acheivements, and we do all that we can to help encourage and lift one another up even through the difficult times, whether it's a difficult point in training, or a struggle in life.

GOALS
I am still trying to define my goals for this running season and as they become more clear, I will take what I've learned from this past training year and put it into practice to become a stronger runner.

As always, my number one goal is to always run happy, run with joy. Because if I am not finding joy in what I am doing, I should not be doing it.

4 days

2011-02-11T09:40:00.000-08:00

Pre-Rocky, I was wondering how much time I would take off from running. Taking a cue from Scott Jurek, I figured a nice block of 2 -4 weeks with no running would be a good idea. I've trained for quite a long while with many, many miles on my body over the past year and thankfully, have no injuries.

2-4 weeks of crosstraining, not thinking about any races to train for or even sign up for, seems like a reasonable amount of time. I strongly felt that after running 100 miles, I would not want for a run for at least that amount of time.

I was wrong. What else is new? My recovery is going well. Other than being very tired my only real issue is my right knee which took a hit on one of the wooden bridges during Rocky. It is quite sore and is lending itself to a "peg leg" gait. My kids are enjoying calling me a pirate. I have promised myself that I will absolutely not run at all until I have zero pain.

Waking up on Monday, I had a strange sensation. I had nothing hanging over my head. As much as I wanted to run Rocky, I will admit, it was, at times, one of those "things" looming in my mind. Knowing I HAD to get my training done so I could get to the start line at Rocky was, at times, annoying. Honestly, the last two weeks of training before the race, I had to motivate myself with the promise of taking off as much time as I wanted once the race was over, whether I finished it or not. Not having that external pressure on myself on Monday was nice, but at the same time, kind of a lonely, empty feeling. Still, I swore I would not even consider anything for 2 - 4 weeks. Then last night, I could no longer sit idle. Instead of 4 weeks, my fast lasted 4 days. I started scanning races to possibly sign up for. There are not too many for me to choose from because they have to be local right now.

I did not sign up for anything, yet... but I am considering two possibilities in April. I have some longer term goals that I would like to entertain as well but they are somewhat incongruent with one another which would mean I probably could not work on both of them at the same time. Not sure where I will go first.

I suppose that is the beauty of rest. I don't have to decide anything right now. It is ok to rest. Maybe I will even get caught up on some things around the house.

In other news... today is my sweet grandbaby's 1st birthday! Ahhh... the good things in life!

Rocky Raccoon 100

2011-02-07T18:27:00.000-08:00

Trying to use words to express what happened this weekend is close to impossible, so I ask for your forgiveness ahead of time if this post seems disjointed, rambling, or otherwise poorly written.

I began running in September of 2006 as a challenge to myself. If I could run consistently for three months, I would indulge myself to a new bicycle that I could ride outside as an alternative to my spin classes. Five weeks later I ran my first 5K in honor of Hans Weberling, and I was hooked.

I ran my first (and strangely, my only) marathon in Jan of 2007 and with little thought, turned around and ran Hog's Hunt 50K a few weeks later. I fell in love with trail running and decided at that point that I wanted to run a 100.

In 2009, I ran my first 50 miler and had a wonderful time! In April of 2010, my second 50 miler at OT 50 in Arkansas. What a beautiful course! Yesterday, I was able to reach my goal set in 2007 by finishing the Rocky Raccoon 100 in 26:04! 103rd place, 16th female, 6th in my age group.

So that's the short version. Now for the details...

Rocky Raccoon 100
Going into the weekend of Rocky, there was great excitement in the air as we were told that several of the elite ultra runners would be running Rocky as well. Also, a predicted snow fall of 1-3 inches for Houston was creating quite a stir among everyone in the area and a traveling nightmare for those trying to get to Houston. Several runners were not able to make it to the race because of the closed airports, icy roads, and snowy conditions on the way to Houston.
Mark and I had reservations to stay in the park in a "winterized" shelter. I can assure you, winterized was a very liberal term. It was freezing out there! 23 degrees Friday night left me cold and sleepless in Huntsville, Texas.
I always have a fear pre-race that I will not hear my alarm or that it will malfunction and not go off. Saturday morning, I began to hear cars and realized that my fear had come true. I had dropped off to sleep for a few minutes only to be awoken, thank goodness, by those attending the race. I jumped out of the sleeping bag and had 35 mins to eat, dress, and get to the start line. Looking back, this worked out well because it didn't allow me much time to worry or second guess my sanity.
It was pretty cold at the start so I was looking forward to running just to warm up. I kissed Mark goodbye and headed out into the cold, dark woods. The energy was electrifying! I immediately forgot that I couldn't feel my toes and started moving forward. Ben and Sophia were next to me and we were able to run together for a good bit. It was great talking with them and more importantly laughing with them. They are wonderful people with great hearts for running.
One of the only mishaps of the race was discovered at this point. My hydration pack was frozen and I could not drink. Some of the volunteers at DamNation tried to help me out, but as soon as they were able to defrost the tubing, it would refreeze. I knew I should have blown the water back into the bladder, I just simply forgot. Lesson learned. This caused me to not drink nearly enough which may have played into my later issues with stomach upset and dizziness.
I spoke with a couple of other runners, one of whom asked me how I prepared for the race. I, doubting up till the finish that I had adequately trained, was hesitant to share that my longest run had only been 42 miles. I know other runners who run much higher mileage than I did. This runner shared with me that his longest run had been a 15 miler. I don't know if he finished or not. Some other ladies overheard us and shared that their longest run had been a few 20 milers. Not sure how they fared either.
Soon I was running with a very nice guy from Oklahoma, Bill. We ran most of the first loop together and had an opportunity to share about our faith and how it motivates our running. Truly a blessing to experience that on the first loop out.
Park Road Aid station was rockin' the Jimmy Buffet themed Margaritaville and the H-trexer's proved what true heroes are. Hanging out, on a freezing cold day, listening to runners whine and serving up anything we desired, including GLUTEN-FREE options! Are you kidding me??? Love that! Miles was cooking up something yummy and promised to let me know if I started looking bad...
I ended the first loop feeling great, warming up, and ready to go onto the second loop. Coming into Dogwood, I noticed Jon Walk taking pictures. I tried to hug Jon as I came in, but it looked more like a bodyslam! In spite of my efforts to take him down, he was a gentleman and sent me on my way. Seeing Jon at races doing what he does to support running always lifts my spirits. Mark grabbed me as I crossed the timing mat and played crew. He did a great job getting me out of the aid station and back to the trail. Predicted time for loop 1 was 4.5 hours. I came in ahead of pace at 4:02.

Loop 2 felt great as well. I ran by myself most of the time, listening to the music only on the portion of the trail that looped between the two stops at DamNation. While the volunteers at DamNation were truly a godsend, I came to loathe that portion of the trail. It was a beautiful section, and though it was only 6 miles around, it seemed to go on forever. The music on loops 2 and 3 during those times was very helpful.
It was during loop 2 that I had my first glimpse of Anton, Hal, Scott, and Karl. I only saw Ian on my third loop as he was heading in on his 5th with his pacer...flying, so what I saw was an amazing blur!
I noticed at DamNation that Scott was talking and taking pictures with the volunteers and the runners. I passed him at the aid station and chuckled to myself..."I just passed Scott Jurek!" Of course, shortly thereafter, he passed me again.
As I reached Park Road, Mark was there to cheer me on. I noticed Lynnor, Maryann, and others gathered around Scott. They encouraged me to meet my inspiration to run and maintain a plant-based diet. This picture makes me look like a crazed fan, but truly, I was just so excited to get to meet him!

Before heading out of Park Road Aid Station, Scott asked how I was doing and if I was running the 100. I shared with him how much I admired him and that I was thrilled to not only be running my first 100, but to be running on the same dirt that he was and to have the added blessing of meeting him! A true gentleman who even remembered me when he saw me on the next loop and continued to encourage me.

As I came into Dogwood, Jon, Bill, and Adrienne, as well as other local runners, had gathered to greet the runners as they were finishing their loops. Seeing the group of them standing there brought back memories of my first 50 miler when they came out in the dark of night and surprised me in the middle of nowhere out on the trail. My eyes welled with tears, the first of many times this day.

Photo courtesy of Jon Walk

I finished up loop 2 in 4:36, 24 mins ahead of pace. Pete was there to encourage me and Stacy and Mik had arrived to get ready for Stacy to pace me for loops 4 and 5. They worked fast and furious to get me in and out of the aid station and before I knew it I was off on the third loop.

After giving a few more hugs to Bill, Jon, and Adrienne, Adrienne surprised me by running a few steps with me! This moment of the day will always be remembered as something special. Adrienne is a remarkable runner and she has become a great friend.

Photo courtesy of Jon Walk

Loop 3 was fairly uneventful with one exception. I hit a root and landed on one of the wooden bridges along the lake trail just two miles from the end of the loop. I took a very quick assessment of any injuries and didn't feel like I had done any damage, so I continued on my way. I was getting very excited to be at the end of my 60 miles. Turns out I had landed on my knee pretty hard, bruising it, but it wasn't a concern until later in the race. The only other issue I had was that the sun had set and the temps started dropping rapidly. Stacy had Mark meet me at Park Road to give me my jacket. Thank goodness. It was really cold and I was having some trouble regulating my body temp.

As I had shared in my previous post, I felt pretty sure that I would be able to complete 60 miles, but the remaining 40 were sure to be a tremendous challenge both physically and mentally. I had, for months, been trying to figure out how to "toughen up", and not show any weakness. Then I heard a voice whisper to me, "in your weakness, I am made strong." After spending some time meditating on this verse from scripture, 2Cor 12:10, I felt compelled to embrace my weakness so that He could show His strength. This is not something that I thought others would see, but I knew I would. I knew, because I knew I wasn't strong enough to finish Rocky and if I did, it was only because He worked through others to get me to the finish line. I ran as well as I could, finishing up my three loops in 13:29. 31 minutes under my predicted 14 hour time. When I reached the 60 mile mark, I knew that my physical strength had been exhausted and I was going to be placing myself completely into the hands of God, who worked through Stacy, Mark, and Mik.

Stacy made sure that I changed every stitch of clothing, right there in front of everyone, and I never objected. I was under her command at that time. I ate a bit and then she and I headed out into the cold and dark. Stacy kept a good pace and I happily followed right behind her. I had no desire to "go out to fast" or argue with anything she told me to do. The next two loops are pretty much a blur. I know that pretty early into the fourth loop, my right knee felt like the quad was tight and pulling on it. The more I ran, the more it seemed to hurt, so we began walking more and more. I am so thankful that Mariela introduced the walk/run method to me in a real way this summer. I had used this before, but always felt as though I was somehow "cheating" by using it. She explained that most of us who run ultras will walk some so we should train those muscles as well. And she was absolutely correct. I've been able to recover faster from my long runs this year and run further as a result. As well, my pace has actually become faster, which I really can't explain!

I began to notice some deterioration of my cognitive status. I couldn't add simple numbers. I couldn't remember my kids birthday's. I felt my eyes closing and had no control over them. I was pretty certain I was going to fall asleep while walking. I didn't even know that was a possibility. I was horribly sick to my stomach and wished I could throw up, but didn't because any further loss of calories could have ended my run. I told Stacy what was going on and she continued to encourage me. She suggested I take my 5 hour energy which I had tried in training and worked well. I took it, but it didn't seem to help much. She then gave me some chocolate covered espresso beans and within minutes I was ready to go again. I think I might have even run some more!

Mark and Mik met us at Park Road. My face was so cold and we tried eating more broth and coffee. It wouldn't go down. I was extremely nauseous and could barely drink water by this time. I knew I needed calories, but I could not take any in. I was burning something other than fat stores by this time. Instead of focusing on how lousy I felt, I decided to not say very much, which if you know me, you know I am not one to keep quiet about these types of things, and just trust in Stacy, trust in God, say my prayers coupled with the intentions that went with them, and continue with the forward motion. We came into Dogwood at 1:26 am, a 5:53 loop, on a predicted 6 - 7 hour loop.

I don't remember much about the end of loop 4. Pete was there again which completely astounds me. I have the best friends in the world! To see a friendly face in the crowd always brings me joy, but this time, it helped me to survive. Seeing Pete, Mark, Mik, and others I knew, kept me out of my head and back in the game.

Stacy was having head lamp issues and being the good girl that I am, (HA!) I actually listened to her command to head out and she would catch me. She did and we proceeded to shuffle our way through the last loop.

This loop was the darkest both figuratively and literally for me. I never told Stacy or anyone how much I didn't care if we stopped. If someone asked me if I wanted to quit at mile 92, I would have said yes. Thankfully, no one asked. The infamous 6 mile loop at DamNation was the worst of all. I was so sick to my stomach. I've never felt that bad. My eyes began closing again. 5 hour energy did nothing. Stacy started hand feeding me, two at a time, skittles. If that isn't someone being Christ to me, I don't know what is. She talked to me the whole time. Even when I didn't answer. She didn't lie to me. She didn't try to make everything ok. She told me we would finish. She told me that I was strong enough. She told me that when the sun came up, things would get better. And they did. Right before dawn, my eyes could no longer focus. All I could see were her shoes. And I followed them. We were both freezing and could not keep warm. I can't explain how primal my sense of life became in these pre-dawn hours. I could envision myself laying on the ground to sleep and probably dying of hypothermia. I didn't care if I finished or not. I didn't speak unless Stacy asked me a question and I'm not even sure I uttered a response most of the time. She instinctively knew what to do and when to do it. I trusted her completely.
I could feel my body shutting itself down to preserve the core. Weirdest feeling ever. It was definitely below 32 degrees and we could no longer maintain our body temps. Thankfully, Stacy had her cell phone with her and called Mark and Mik telling them to bring our heavier coats. They met us at Park Road. Again, I saw many of the same volunteers that had been there most of the day before still there serving us. I took everything off, watch, hydration vest (couldn't drink anyway), spi belt, etc. and donned my big winter jacket. Stacy grabbed her sweatshirt and we both restocked our gloves with hand warmers. I truly don't remember anything more than praying I would not look so bad that Mark would be worried. Mark told me later that he waited outside the port-a-potty to be sure I didn't fall asleep inside or be so confused that I couldn't figure out how to open the door. Guess I fooled him! Not.

We headed out of the aid station, leaving even our head lamps with the guys as the sun was beginning to rise. And just as Stacy promised, I had a renewed sense of strength. We even attempted to run a few downhills, but by this time, my knee was in real pain and I think my walking pace was faster than my running pace.

The finish.

As we approached the 98 mile mark, I started to become overwhelmed with the prospect of finishing. I didn't have the energy to cry, but I could feel it in my throat. I wasn't sure what I was going to do or say at the finish as I really never thought about what would happen as I crossed the finish line, only what I would go through to get to it!

By some miracle, we were able to jog the last stretch in to the finish line. Joe, the RD, was there to personally hand out the finisher's belt buckles. I hugged him and thanked him from the bottom of my heart. I was surprised that I didn't cry. I wanted to, but I couldn't. Maybe I had nothing left to even cry.

I hugged Stacy, Mark, and Mik. I thanked, and thanked, and thanked them and then thanked them all again. They were the perfect people to help me reach my goal.

Stacy tweaked her ankle right at the finish and thankfully she is ok, but that speaks to the passion she has to running and helping others. She risked her own training and race goals to help me get to the finish line. I know she is hurting today too. Yet she went to work, while I sat around the house enjoying the feel of victory. I know she says that I could have done this without her, but I highly doubt it. She was Christ to me out there. And I loved every minute of following Him on that trail.

Running ultras is an experiment of one, or so it is said. I can attest to you that it is not. Maybe as far as training, nutrition, and hydration go it is, but getting through a race of this level, even if you run alone, is not something that is done solo. We all need some assistance, be it through pacers, aid stations, a crew, whatever.

To everyone who has ever offered me any word of encouragement or advice, experience, or prayer. Thank you. To anyone who has run along side me, thank you. To those who watched my children, picked up the slack in my other obligations in life, thank you. To those who allowed me to offer my prayers for each mile I have run, thank you. To my husband and my children, you mean the world to me and I can never find the words to tell you how very much I love each and every one of you.

And finally, I thank the Author of My Life, for He knows my heart, my strengths, and my weaknesses, and His grace is sufficient for me.

Eve of Rocky 100 Eve

2011-02-03T17:32:00.000-08:00

There's been much ado about nothing around here the last few days. Today especially. There is a rumor that we are going to be "hit" with a snow storm which could potentially leave 1 - 3 inches of white stuff or at the very least a pretty nasty coating of ice, but as of this moment, nearly 6 pm, there has been not even hint of a flake. Unless you count the numerous ones combing the grocery stores for supplies, the school administrators whom have already canceled school for tomorrow or the county officials who have closed the county buildings as of 5 o'clock with no promise to open tomorrow.

This is truly silly. Over reaction to be kind, ridiculous to be real. I feel most sorry for those runners who have trained so hard to run Rocky Raccoon only to not be able to come because the airport is closed. One runner is coming from Miami, to Houston, yet can't get here because of the threat of snow/ice. Current temps in Miami are 73. Houston 33. No snow. No rain. But lots of canceled flights.

This video from Michael Berry's show puts things into a funny perspective, and since I like to laugh, I figured it would be fun to share it with you.

As far as my preparations for the race itself go, I haven't even started to pack, which is probably not a good thing, but I've been doing my best to keep myself busy so as to not obsess too much about this undertaking. I've read a lot of blogs, reports, scripture, etc., to strengthen my mind as well as my soul.

Going into Rocky, I feel as strong as I have ever felt with regards to my running. I know I have some areas that could be stronger such as my core or my upper body, but even those muscles are stronger than before. I think that I am as well prepared as I can be physically for this race. Mentally, I have been trying to prepare myself for the journey. I have envisioned how difficult it will be to run through the painful times, the cold, the stomach issues, the darkness with the creepy noises. I pray that I am prepared well enough in that realm, but I know that I can't truly be prepared for it until I go through it.

I've never run past 50 miles. I've heard it said that you can "fake it" through a 50 miler. In other words, if you've pulled a muscle, have stomach issues, or the like, you can probably gut out a 50 miler. But trying to white-knuckle a 100 miler is not an option for most of us. I know that there are elites who can do it, and more power to them. I can take pain pretty well, but I always run with the prevailing thought in the back of my mind that I am still a Mom and a Nana and I will still have to take care of my family come Monday morning. Most elites I read about don't have these things to consider. Not all, but most.

I have decided to put it all out there this weekend. I won't stop unless my pacer, an MD, tells me to or until I drop to the ground and the decision is made for me. I have been running for only 4 years and 2 of those I have been preparing to run this 100. The time is now.

I love reading Dave's blog and he has put up some very inspirational posts this week. I am adopting his attitude towards the 4th loop, Loop 4 is on notice and I will not give it the satisfaction of a win against me!

Dave is a strong man and I know many like him who can call upon much physical strength and mental preparedness to not show weakness and cross that finish line. I am not that strong. I am not as prepared mentally as I would like to be but only because this is a new challenge that is unfamiliar to me. Fear of the unknown is present, but I will not allow it to rule me.

And I will show weakness. As much as I do not want to, I know myself well enough to know that I will. I will try to hide it because I am prideful and as much as I hate my weakness, I know it exists. I was meditating upon this weakness and how to not let it show when a verse came to me...

"My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness". I will rather boast most gladly of my weakness, in order that the power of Christ may dwell with me. 2 Cor 12:10

This brought me such peace and why it came to me when it did, as it just popped into my mind, I can only imagine had nothing to do with my seriously lacking bible verse memory skills. I will rest in the knowledge that He gently reminded me to remain focused on what HE will do in Huntsville this weekend.

I will get to the start line on Saturday and give it all that I have and then some. Then I will embrace my weakness so that the power of Christ can be seen. I am confident that He is asking me to break myself down once again so that He can rebuild me, more in His image then I was before. And that doesn't come pain-free.

Rocky Taper

2011-01-29T15:01:00.000-08:00

The taper is going as well as can be expected, I suppose. I may just drive my family nuts before next weekend. I am trying to distract myself with a few good books, Harry Potter and Organized Simplicity are the current reads. I am enjoying them both, but honestly, what I want to do right now is organize every single closet, drawer, cabinet, and bookshelf that lies within the boundaries of my home. I would love even more to grab a few gallons of paint and get to work redecorating the house.

I ran my last "long" run which was only about 7 miles, which was supposed to be 10, but my running partner needed to finish up earlier than expected. I thought about going out for more later in the day, but I will just put a few more on the shoes tomorrow.

I am about as well trained for Rocky as I can be with regards to mileage. I wish I had been able to put a bit more time into core and upper body, but I am definitely stronger than I have ever been. A good goal for after Rocky will be to focus on those two things for a few weeks before ramping up the mileage again.

Tonight I will spend time making my list of things to pack in the drop bags, though I suspect it will be minimal. I find I lean more and more on less and less at events now, but I do want to be prepared. Thankfully, Joe Prusaitis runs an amazing race and his volunteers are top notch. They get running. They get how to help. And I know that I can rely on them to take good care of me as well as all the other runners out there.

Found myself a bit awestruck this week when I heard that some of the big dawgs were coming to play! I am just as excited about seeing old friends as well as some new ones I've made in the last few months. For now, I am going to focus on staying in the moment, living simply and fully and not just wishing I could jump to next weekend. I have worked a long time to get to this point in the dream and I do not want to miss a moment of it!

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined.

Henry David Thoreau

Training Fatigue

2011-01-23T19:22:00.000-08:00

Just under 2 weeks away from Rocky and my body is beginning to really let me know how much I've been using it lately.

Little aches and pains that, at times, are a little more than "little" aches and pains. I seem to be having hamstring issues on the left leg and sciatic pain on the right. Neither seems to bother me while running, but afterwards, I feel like a little old lady limping around.

I'm really fatigued today, so I ditched my scheduled run. I am seeing a lot of bruising popping up in weird spots. These two symptoms tell me that my iron is probably low again, so I'm doubling my intake and praying I get some energy back soon.

I am looking forward to Rocky. I wish I was more excited than I am, but right now, I just want to get through it, survive, and then rest. Not sure if this is a normal feeling, but it is my normal right now.

I am officially in taper mode and I imagine many drawers and closets will get organized over the next two weeks. Or maybe I will just delve into the Harry Potter books I've always wanted to read...

Happy running!

27 degrees

2011-01-12T14:23:00.000-08:00

That was the temp this morning when I set out on my 10 mile loop. This is my first run since the 40 miler on Saturday. I had hoped to run Sunday and Tuesday, but with several sick children in the house, this was not to be the case. Mom-duty comes first and I am just thankful that I didn't have to skip the 40 miler, only a few shorter runs.

I was not really looking forward to getting into the cold weather since I seem to be fighting a bit of the illness myself, but after reading Dave's post, I had to run. I even wished for snow. Being inspired by other runners is always a good thing. It gets me out of myself and out on the road.

My legs felt pretty nasty for the first few miles. The flat roads felt like hills. I took it slow and tried to think of it as more of a slow recovery run. The sun was shining beautifully and I tried to place myself in the moment. Sun. Brisk, cold air. Peace. God. The kids feeling ill was still present in my mind, but I knew that they were in safe hands at home.

After about four miles, my tummy started talking to me, telling me that I should probably change my route up and find the park restrooms. Unfortunately, as I approached them, I could see that they were closed for maintenance. Uh oh.

I had to really cut the run short and only was able to get in 5.5 miles today. I have 20 on the schedule tomorrow and a few more ( 5 or so) on Friday morning before heading out on retreat with my confirmation students. Trying to get running in this weekend will be close to impossible as my focus will be on them. I do plan to try to run Sunday night after I get back.

I feel like now that my longest week and mileage has been done, the next few weeks of training are going to be trying to strike a balance between staying healthy and uninjured. The last thing I want now is to have all of these weeks of hard work to be for naught because I get bronchitis or hurt myself or something as equally frustrating.

Now it is time to start thinking logistically about how Rocky should go. My ultimate goal is to finish, but I would love to have a plan thought out for nutrition and a time goal to aim for. I think 28 hours would be a great 1st 100 time. I will admit that cutting it that close to the 30 hour time limit makes me more than a little nervous.

Running Rocky won't be a solo event. There will be others helping me the entire time and I know that I can't get it done without their help. Perhaps someday I will be able to be completely self-sufficient on running a 100, but this time, I don't want to be.

The 40 mile Translation

2011-01-09T18:21:00.000-08:00

I have been cautiously optimistic about actually having the opportunity to run my longest distance ever on concrete yesterday. Between a pretty angry hamstring/sciatic nerve issue and ongoing viruses in my home, I wasn't sure I would make it to the start of my 40 miler. Thankfully, my body was cooperative and I even had a decent night's sleep which is highly unusual for me. When the alarm went off at 4:00 am, I was already up and ready to get going.

I have done a few 50 milers on the dirt and loved every minute of it, (well, maybe not every minute), but the thought of running almost that many miles on the road has not appealed to me. Life being what it is right now, I had to either do my longest training run on pavement or not do it at all. Embracing the idea that it would make me mentally stronger to do something I wasn't too keen on helped me to keep my focus. As well, several people were kind enough to run with me and the last 10 miles I had 4 angels show up and help me finish the mileage up.

Yesterday's weather could not have been anymore perfect! I began my run solo at 4:45 am, in the dark and with temps around 43 degrees. I kept on my sweats and of course my blinkie and ran the first 10 miles. I think I was about 5 miles into the run when I realized that I was completely outside of myself and had no recollection of the path I had just run. I felt completely "in the zone".

I finished the first 10 miles in time to start with the Woodlands Fit groups 21 miler. The plan was to run alongside them for the comraderie and then to finish my final 10 miles on my own. I missed the official start of the run because I was in need of the restroom and it seemed I wasn't alone. There was a 10 - 15 minute wait to use the one in Luke's causing me to miss the beginning of the run. This was probably a blessing in disguise though because I might otherwise have been tempted to run the pace of my running buddies instead of my own. I knew that it would be hard to actually run with someone because they are training for a marathon and I am training for a 100 miler, two totally different beasts. I have had much success with the 8:2 method in these long runs and plan to use this during Rocky, so my training runs have been structured as such. If you want to finish a fast marathon, running with me is probably not a good idea.

The next 21 miles went very well. I had to stop two more times for the restroom of which I waited another 10 mins and forgot to turn off my watch. I typically turn off my watch if I have to wait in line because this usually isn't a problem during races.

The weirdest part of the 21 was getting a text from Mark after I had run 20 miles and he was just leaving for work. I had to double check the time because it felt like noon to me, yet it was only 8:15 am.
I saw so many running friends on the route and it felt so nice to see them all having great runs and lots of fun.

As I came into my 31st mile, I checked my phone and had texts from a few people that were planning to meet up with me to run a portion of the last ten. Marcos and Amy met me at Luke's and committed to running 5 miles with me. Holden and Christy both were meeting me at Shadowbend Park and planned to run a few as well. It was the perfect team of runners! I can't thank them enough for sticking with me. While I know I could have finished that last ten on my own, I was really, really glad that I didn't. You guys are wonderful!

All in all, the run went smoothly. My nutrition seems to be working well. I eat every 5 miles, typically trail mix, but twice I did eat some honey stinger chews. I love those things! They are like candy and I think they are so tasty! Not like a gel. They sit on the stomach well. I also take an S-cap once per hour. Even though the temps are low, I am afraid to not take them because I feel so good at the end of the runs. I also tried 5 hour energy on my last two big runs and while this is something I would never typically choose to use, many other runners who have had great success have recommended that I try them in training for use during the 100, especially in the wee hours after midnight. I expected that they would upset my stomach or make me feel weird, but so far, I have not had any issues with them. I took one yesterday at the end of the first 10 miles and other than feel like I was somehow cheating, I felt great and had no ill-effects from it.

At the end of the run, I was tired, but I still had some mileage in me. I am not sure if I had 60 miles left in me though. I expected that a 41 mile run would do a lot to boost my confidence, but if I was to be totally honest, I think it could have done just the opposite. I was tired. Maybe I had another 20 or 30 miles left in me, but 60? I don't know.
How does running a 40 miler translate to training for a 100? We run 21 miles in preparation for a marathon. I can see how 21 would boost the ego enough to believe you can finish 26. I ran 35 in preparation of a 50 miler, and I felt that I could finish that distance. But running 40 and thinking it will translate into being physically and mentally ready for the 100? I just don't know.
One thing is for certain. I can no longer underestimate the challenge of the 100. Not that I was, but I think the enormity of the distance is hitting me now. I have seen it said that one "could fake their way through a 50". I understand that phrase now. The other part of it is that while you could make it through a 50 on pure guts, I am not so convinced that I can accomplish this during a 100.
Obviously dwelling on these thoughts won't do much to get me through the 100, but I like to try to keep things real in my world, and my thoughts at this point are this.
I will start Rocky 100.
I will run, walk, and crawl as far as I can.
I will do my best to get farther than I ever have before and if that means a finish, all the better.
Maybe the DNF's that I have had this year have been to help prepare me for this moment. To not underestimate a race. To not get too comfortable or too confident. To not set unattainable goals.
I am looking forward to the next few weeks of running and the eventual race itself. I want to see what I am really made of. I want to see what challenges I am able to overcome and how fully I can rely on myself and God to pull me through those moments I know are waiting for me on that trail...

High Mileage Week

2011-01-04T08:30:00.000-08:00

Yesterday began the highest mileage week of training for Rocky 100. I came down with a nasty little stomach bug on Sunday immediately after my run and spent the day in my bathrobe. It was bizarre to feel so good on a run and have it change completely as soon as my run was over.

Thankfully, yesterday was a scheduled rest day, so I did just that. Sort of. I didn't run. I did do the push-ups and core work on the schedule. And I ate several helpings of Lugow, a Filipino rice dish made with ginger and chicken. Yes, chicken. Christmas has wreaked havoc on my vegan eating but that is another topic for another day.
The lugow seemed to help. I was starving. I was definitely calorie deficient since I didn't eat before my run Sunday nor was I able to eat after it. I went to bed last night feeling pretty confident that I would be able to run this morning.
I was out of bed with the intention of running early, but my tummy had other ideas. So, I am waiting it out. Not sure if I will be able to get this run in today or not. But the goal is to get it done.

Welcome 2011!

2011-01-03T15:19:00.000-08:00

The time between Christmas and New Year's is a pretty quiet time around our home, usually. This year it seems to have been a bit more full with family visiting, Christmasing with friends, and even a few illnesses.

I like to spend that week reflecting on my goals for the past year and set new goals for the new one which lay ahead. I did not get to do very much of that, at least not as much as I think something so important would require until yesterday. After my 12 miler, during which I felt great, I stopped in to the restroom and almost passed out from a weird headache and unexpected bout of throwing up. I'm sure the folks at Kroger love seeing that situation! I spent the rest of the day in and out of bed (and the bathroom) which gave me lots of time to reflect on things.

I did decide to adopt the Advent Conspiracy's Philosophy of :

Spend Less
Give More
Love All
Worship Fully

Some of these seem fairly straight-forward, but leave it to me to complicate them a bit. It's my specialty.

Spend Less... most people would probably think financially with this one. I do intend to spend less this year and what I do buy will be bought only because it is needed. I will buy second-hand when possible and shop for the lowest prices possible. I will also be more dutiful in my pledge to donate one item for every item brought in, with the exception of food.

Some other ways in which I will Spend Less...

Spend less time worrying about things I have no control over. This bad habit demonstrates a lack of faith. It is a symptom of trying to always be in control of everything and never really trusting in God.

Spend less time being critical of others, especially my children. I will look for the good in people. I will try to see things from their point of view and act out of love rather than discontent.

Spend less energy on things that do not grow me spiritually. OK, so I can't give up grocery shopping, but I can make grocery shopping a means by which I serve my family and in doing that, I grow in virtue and hopefully learn to do it joyfully.

Give more...
Time to developing my relationship with God.
Time to my family and friends. Real time. Face to face.
Time to those who need someone to care for them.
Learn to give presence instead of giving presents

Love All
Even when it isn't convenient, easy, or pleasant.
To love others more than myself. To love God above all. To show that love by being His hands and feet.

Worship Fully
With my whole heart, my whole mind, my whole soul.
To yearn for Him constantly, consistently.
To find Him in the tabernacle as I sit in Adoration.
To seek Him in others.
To serve others until they know His love and mercy.

I have a few other "of this world" goals pertaining to eating, running, and organization, but they are pretty much the same every year... eat better, run more, be better organized. It's not that I fail at these, but I seem to make baby steps towards a better version of myself and I now understand that I will never be right where I want to be because I will never be perfect! Only took me 45 years to figure that one out!

I look forward to putting these goals into practice this year and enjoying life at a new level of peace with someone other than myself at the center...

Leading the Heart

2010-12-16T22:14:00.000-08:00

Leading the Heart. That's pretty much my mantra right now. Much of my running lately has been under the "I really don't want to" category. That was until this past weekend at Texas Trails. I signed up for the race to help spur my motivation level and try to stoke the flame to keep training for Rocky. I am thankful that I think it was some good time to run and clear my head and hear what I needed to hear.

It's no secret to anyone who knows me that I have been really considering dropping out of the 100 at Rocky. Yet, just when I make up my mind to do so, something stirs me to pick up the baton again and "just get it done."

I know that "just get it done" should not be a justification for running a 100 miles. In fact, I don't think I would ever suggest to anyone that they consider such a thing if that was their attitude toward a particular race goal. But I know myself well enough to understand that I am not really dealing with motivation here. I am discovering that what is truly going on is a serious case of self-doubt, exhibiting itself as lack of motivation and even downright dread of doing something that I love to do.

Understanding that this is what is driving my training, I've made the conscious decision to just get it done. I am training as if I will be running the 100. I am confident that by leading my heart, and at times yanking it along, to the start line in February, I will be physically ready to take on this race. The mental aspect of the race is where the true challenge will lie for me. It always is.

I have been listening to Downhere, a group I heard live recently, and these lyrics hit me in a new way the other day...(from the song Something Heavenly )

I'm so far from what I wanna be
I really am my own worst enemy
Please don't let me get the better of me
take this earthly thing and make it finally
something heavenly

In running, in my faith life, in all areas of my life, this verse could be applied. I don't know how it happens, but I wake up every now and again and realize that I have taken control of the very thing I need to let go of if I want it to be successful. Because "I" can do nothing, but in Him, all things can be done, if it is His will.

So I will train as if it is His will for me to run this race. I will act as if it is. I will suit up and I will show up, and if I truly trust in His will for me, even in something as trivial as running, I will accept where ever I end up on Feb 5th.

Blessings come from Blessings

2010-12-15T19:40:00.000-08:00

And this most perfect blessing makes me smile every time I see her! Grandbabies are amazing!

Texas Trails 2010

2010-12-12T12:39:00.000-08:00

What a difference a year makes! Last year was the inaugural run for the Texas Trails race (at least without the Sunmart sponsorship) and the weather proved to be the biggest issue for most. With a starting temp of below 19 degrees (highly unusual for us here in the Houston area), this year's temps of 57 at the start seemed perfect!

I signed up for this race as a motivator. I needed something to encourage me in my efforts to get to the start line at Rocky this February. I think that this race did exactly what I needed it to do and I am glad I ran it.

I had no real time goal for the race, as I was treating it more as a training run as well as an opportunity to run with Stacy and catch up on things. We stuck together for the entire race, implementing the 8:2 method and finished strong, feeling great, and feeling even better today! Our finish time was 6:22 and though it was not a PR (mine is 6:14) I know that if I had been after a PR, I would have reached it. I really was more interested in just enjoying the run and taking in the whole experience.

I saw many familiar faces, which is always nice. I met a few new ones as well. I think the thing I love most about trail running is how encouraging most of the other runners can be. Hearing, "Great Job!" as a runner passes by does a lot to lift the spirit and speaks to the notion that we really are all in this together and though we all can't win the race, we are each inspired by an individual's efforts.

Speaking to my own efforts yesterday, I felt great the whole day. My hydration and nutrition felt like they were spot on. I took an S-cap every hour, ate every 5 miles, just a little. I felt like I needed salt more than I usually do, and at the end of the race, I could see a lot of salt on my clothing. I've not experienced that before. I was glad that I stuck with the S-caps as it would have been easy to think that I didn't need them in yesterday's cooler temps (compared to our summer runs).

I ate 5 honey stinger chews every 10 miles and alternated with some potato chips and tomatoes and grapes that I had in my cooler. The aid stations were lacking, to say the least, but twice I was able to grab a salted potato. I also had a few doses of Coke (something I never drink off the course, but find very helpful during long races) and at the final loop, I did an Emergen C which I think gave me a nice boost to finish the race with.

Stacy's friend Mik was there as support, and he was great! He knew instinctively how to help and it saved us time. Thanks Mik! A few other folks were at the start/finish line for that final loop and one of them offered to fill my Nathan bladder. Again, saved me time and allowed me to use the port-a-potty which is always a good thing. Thank you, Carmen!

Stacy and I were consistent in our pacing. We ran 8 mins and walked 2 mins the entire race. No real issues while running physically. I never felt like I was bonking which I think speaks to consistent nutrition. We finished the race feeling strong.

I am really not one to complain about an event, because I feel lucky to have the opportunity to run, but this race, I have to say, is one I am not sure I will run again.

Upon arriving at the race, which was not a large race by any stretch of the imagination, I was directed to a parking spot. I was not allowed to decide where I would like to park. I have run several races in Huntsville, but have never had this experience. I arrived 1.5 hours ahead of the start time yet I had to park the farthest from the start line. I wasn't excited about it, but I accepted it. One gentleman I overheard wasn't as accepting as I. He asked the race volunteer if he could possibly park closer and the response he got was, "Sure, come back in 30 mins! You are running a 50K, a few more steps won't kill you!" I was in shock. It wasn't said jokingly, it was rude. The man explained that he had several things to carry and would really have liked to have parked closer and again the volunteer chided him to come back in 30 mins. Wow.

Next, I went to the Lodge to pick up my race packet. I was told by someone to locate my number on a list outside of the lodge and then tell the packet folks what my number was. I don't carry my glasses with me, so locating my number on a list of other runners with type at a small font size is not something I can do very well. I prayed that I had the right number and headed to pick up my packet. As I approached the table, I was instructed to pick up a plastic bag and fill it myself. LOL I know this sounds spoiled, but really? There was absolutely no packet preparation done at all by the RD. The bags were still folded and in a stack. I picked one up and was asked what size shirt I would like. I am pretty certain I indicated that when I registered, but whatever. From there I went to retrieve my bib. I told the volunteer my number and I was handed a bib and timing chip. There was no label indicating that it was indeed my number. There was no cross check of my name with the number, they just took my word for it. I have never seen anything like it.

I do not depend on aid stations during my races. I pack as if there won't be any, and I am glad that I did yesterday. That being said, I know other people who were in need of things and having paid for a race with aid stations, did not get the support they should have. I do not think that this says that we are "spoiled" because if a runner knows that there will be aid on the course, they plan for that. If the same runner knows that there will be no aid or very minimal aid, they will prepare for that as well.

The aid stations were poorly stocked. There were no electrolyte caps as promised. There was little assistance to help runners who needed bottles filled, hydration packs filled, etc. Stacy was looking for some fruit and was handed an entire apple. Slices would have been more helpful. Granted this was a 50K and not a 50 or 100 miler, but honestly, I've seen more help at a 5 mile race than I saw yesterday. There was absolutely no enthusiasm from the aid station workers. It was almost as if they didn't want to be there. I do not remember this being the case last year.

At the finish, another runner who had completed the race was handing out finisher shirts and medals. Last year when I ran the race, I found out a few days after the race that I had placed as 2nd Female in my age group. I contacted the RD and he mailed out my award several months later. I am not a collector of awards, but I think this one bothered me because there was not one person at the finish line when I finished to hand out awards, shirts or medals. This year, it was a runner who had run the race himself.

I decided to check out the stats of the race to see if I placed this year. We found the list of finishers and the only age group listed was 0-99. When I saw the RD, I asked him if he was going to be posting the age group results later. He stated that he decided he wasn't going to break the results into age groups this time and just gave everyone a medal. He asked me if I got one and I said yes. He said, "so than you can't complain!" I wasn't complaining, I was inquiring. Today when I was checking the official results, I noticed that the 12.5 mile race was divided into age groups, but the 50 K was not. Very strange.

I was eating some tortilla soup that the race provided and he followed up by asking me if I liked it, being polite, I said that I did. I asked him if he made it. He said, "Yes. I paid for it, so I made it." I don't know that I have ever run across such arrogance.

At the finish, several of us were sitting around chatting about the day and the RD approached us to ask us how we liked the race. Stacy informed him of how she felt about the aid stations. He squirmed and we could tell he really didn't want to hear any feedback unless it was positive. Another runner mentioned that he had lost his electrolytes on the course and could really have used some. He suggested that next time he should have them at the aid stations. The RD's response, "Well, there were bowls of salt out!" The list of aid station provisions clearly stated that electrolytes would be available.

I can live with poor aid stations, lack of supplies, and no awards. That isn't what I run for. I do not think I can stand an arrogant RD though. I will give him the benefit of the doubt that maybe I misunderstood him or perhaps he was having a bad day, but I would caution anyone that considers running this race next year to be prepared to be your own support and do not expect anything else from the race except a nice trail and spending time with others that love the trail as much as you... which in the end is what it is all about anyway.

Hiccups

2010-12-02T20:47:00.000-08:00

I thought I had dodged the illness from the first week of training, but alas, I did not.
I had the chance to run the Thanksgiving day race with a friend. We decided to not go for any PRs but rather to just enjoy the day. Honestly, there are so many people that unless you start at the front of the pack, weaving through the rows and rows of people make a PR very difficult to achieve. I am certainly not fast enough to start at the front of the pack, so hence, my decision to hang back and enjoy a fun run with 5000 of my friends and neighbors.
After the race, almost instantly, I started sneezing and feeling chilled. I got home, started the Turkey for dinner and proceeded to spiral downward into a cesspool of symptoms resembling the flu. I am not 100% convinced that it was the flu, but it was certainly more than a cold.
Whatever it was, it stuck around for a good week and yesterday was my first run since Thanksgiving. It was nice to get back out there, but I could not deny that my body is still not where it needs to be for full-on Rocky training. I have had to back down the mileage expectations for this week and run on feel. I don't want to risk a rebound illness while the immune system is still lacking.
I did another run tonight. I had anticipated doing 8 - 10 miles and while on the run, opted for the 8. I was glad I did by mile 5. Fatigue set in and moving forward was feeling less and less like I would like it to.
I am glad to be back at running in spite of this hiccup in training. Honestly, it hasn't helped my heart to feel like it really wants to do this thing in February, but only time will tell. One positive that came from the unexpected rest time - my hamstring and calf seems to have recovered and are no longer painful!
For now, I will enjoy the training I can get in, listen to my body, and embrace the season of Advent.

Week 1

2010-11-21T09:19:00.000-08:00

Training for Rocky this week went well. I have been fighting some sort of illness but managed to get 90 percent of my training in.

The legs are feeling a bit "funky" today, calf aches and pains, a hip flexor a bit angry, and a bruised toe are letting me know that the last few weeks of running and racing and little to no real time set aside for a full recovery is not the way to go. I slept a full 12 hours Weds night. This is not a normal occurrence for me and was the first indicator that something was up. I'm still learning to listen to the body and the real trick for me is figuring out if a particular "issue" is something to run through or something to listen to.

When Boo climbed into bed with me this morning at the precise time I was supposed to get up and run another 10 - 15 miles, I opted for the snuggle time with him. Knowing how quickly this time will pass, I believe I made the right choice. As we watched Thomas and he ate the breakfast I had prepared him, he said to me, "Mommy, I will always love you. Even when I'm 39!" Sigh.... love that kid!

I've been doing more reading on St. Francis and his spirituality speaks so strongly to my heart. Simplicity. Humility. Joy. Solitude. All things that I am probably LEAST associated with, but all things that I long for. Slowly, ever so slowly, I feel God stripping away the things of the world that really don't matter and find Him filling them with tender moments like this morning that will always be cherished.

The only way to make rapid progress along the path of divine love is to remain very little and put all our trust in Almighty God. - St. Therese of Lisieux

Plan in Place

2010-11-16T07:14:00.000-08:00

I have been able to come up with a doable plan for Rocky 100. I know it is achievable, what I lack is the drive to follow through.

I thrive very well on structure and discipline and having had a few weeks of neither has not helped me to stay motivated. I am hoping that following my plan will encourage my heart to follow in a timely manner.

It was a bit brisk out there this morning, but still quite a wonderful morning for a run. It definitely feels like fall!

Stuck in Planning

2010-11-12T13:46:00.000-08:00

I am trying to develop a solid yet realistic training plan that will get me to the finish line of Rocky 100 in Feb. Nothing is coming easily and I almost feel ready to give up before I even begin because I can't find a plan to fit.

I am coming to truly understand the expression "we are each an experiment of one" now. The most important thing for me is going to be making my schedule work for me and not vice versa. I do not have a "typical" running schedule if there even is such a thing. So my plan will look dramatically different than what it has been in the past. If it gets me where I need to be, I will be good. If it doesn't...well, I just don't know.

Rocky Raccoon 25K

2010-11-07T09:22:00.000-08:00

After last weekend's fairly ego-busting romp, I convinced Stacy to run a race that we had already decided to volunteer at, the Rocky Raccoon 10K/25K/50K.

It was decided that we would run this as a training run and have a nice, relaxed run on some beautiful trails and then show up for our time to help the HTrex Aid Station. The 25K seemed to fit our needs perfectly.

The morning started at an early 4:30 am, heading to Huntsville State Park in 34 degree temps. I had Lem and her friend tag along for the "experience" since they both are budding runners. Hot Cocoa and fresh baked Cranberry muffins in hand, they piled into the Nerd Herder with coats and blankets for everyone.

We met Stacy in the dark and suddenly realized how very, very cold it was! I told the girls to hang out in the Nerd Herder for as long as they wanted to so as to keep warm, but asked that they not run the engine because I was low on fuel.

Stacy and I headed to the start line and at 7 AM, we began our training run. It was a great day to run the trails. We saw lots and lots of people, many of which looked as though they had not run trails before, but seemingly enjoying the nice change of venue from road running. One guy was thrilled to find Oreos at the aid stations and kept yelling out to the incoming runners, "THEY HAVE OREOS!" He was ecstatic and we told him to hang in there because there would probably be Gummy Bears somewhere along the line too! I bet he'll be back for more trail running!

We probably started out a bit faster than we should have, but it was all for fun and when we ran into Miles, we decided it was all his fault we were running a sub 9 min pace on the trail! He was kind enough to let us know that his game plan was to run until he either finished or blew up. We thanked him for that information and decided we'd opt for the finish! (Love that guy!)

I tend to run faster than I should and knowing that Stacy is recovering from her first 100 miler as well as running on a BROKEN ANKLE and with a BROKEN WRIST from a recent car accident that happened one week before her first 100 at Arkansas Traveler, I thought it best if I let her set the pace.

We had a good run and lots to talk about since we had not seen each other for about 6 weeks. We took the rest of the run easy but Stacy did manage to tweak her ankle and fall. My heart stopped as I saw her hit the ground, but it true to life Stacy form, she got up, shook it off, and kept going. She is a tremendous athlete not to mention insane.

We finished the race/run, and decided we were wanting some real food to eat before heading to the Aid Station to help. As we tried to start the Nerd Herder, there was an eerie "click, click, click" with no engine turn over. Ugh. New cars should not have dead batteries, should they? Upon a bit of investigation, it was discovered that the girls had indeed stayed in the car to keep warm using the radio for quite sometime. Thankfully, there was a nice mountain biker just waiting to offer his help, and soon enough we were on the hunt for some food.

The Aid Station was tons of fun! I have never volunteered at a trail race before. I am so glad that I did and will be certain to do so as often as possible. Trail runners are an incredible bunch of people. From the volunteers that help run the races to the participants of the race, the joy of running shines through even in the difficult times.

A runner, Les, came into the aid station and we noticed that his little finger looked a bit, shall we say, broken? We called Stacy over and within minutes, she fixed him up and sent him on his way! In true runner fashion, instead of crying about how much it must of hurt, he said, "THANK YOU!" and headed to the finish line!

I had the absolute pleasure of seeing several friends finishing up the 50K. Ken, Edwin, Trudy and many others. I had the privilege to meet three ladies, all close to if not already 70 years old. They were walking the 25K. What a fun bunch of girls! Before they left the aid station, one of the ladies shared with me that she had stage 4 lung cancer and that her two friends agreed to walk this with her because she wanted to do it so much. I could barely contain my tears and asked her if I could give her a hug. She appeased me and I could see we were all choked up, so I sent them on their way to finish the final 2.8 miles. My hope is that yesterday was all that she hoped for and more. Friends like that don't come around very often...

So to my friends and family that support what I do, I thank you. Again and again.

Cactus Rose

2010-11-04T10:22:00.000-07:00

Race Prep

The days leading up to my departure to Bandera were somewhat chaotic which is a fairly normal state of affairs around here, but this particular week, they seemed to be even more chaotic events.
We spent the weekend before CR in Garner State Park and had the chance to visit Hill Country State Natural Area, which is in Bandera and where the race is held. I had not had a chance to run any of the course as a training run, so getting a glimpse of what to expect was a nice treat.

The race venue is exactly how Joe describes it...rugged, nasty, and beautiful. Cactus Rose is the perfect name for this event. Cactus would describe the "biting" aspect while Rose would merely touch the surface of the beauty that awaits each runner as they hit the crest of the many hill climbs throughout the course.

I wasn't able to put a whole lot of time into my drop bag strategy and had a mini-panic attack Thursday night as I tried to figure out how to best assemble them. I think I did a pretty good job of it, though, it turns out, I didn't really use them much at all.

I headed out Friday morning to the State Park. It was about a 4.5 hour drive. A lot of time to think and pray about what lay ahead. The race briefing was short and sweet. One thing I did take away from the briefing was how very dry and dusty to course was and the suggestion was made to perhaps consider using a bandana across the face so as to not breath in so much of it. After my experience at Capt'n Karl's I decided that I would definitely heed that advice.

Perfect Day

We couldn't have asked for a more perfect day for a race. It was a bit of a chilly start at 5:00 am. The temps were around 35 degrees according to my car thermometer. I don't mind starting in the cold and dark. I actually rather enjoy it. It helps me to get my head focused on the task at hand and spend some quiet time taking in the night sky.

The first 10 miles were great. Nothing too difficult, just a gentle roll into the next section of trail which awaited us. I placed this section of trail into my mind to recall later if I had to start gutting out some mileage in the second loop. Knowing that the run in to the finish would be merciful gave me hope for a good run.

After about mile 11, however, things got nasty trail-wise. Straight up hill climbs, no switch-backs. Cactus that couldn't be avoided, rocks that rolled, dust that hung in the air for miles. I handled it pretty well until about mile 20 at which point all sense of motivation was completely drained from my body. My legs did not endure the moving rock well, especially on the downhills. I couldn't even feel like I was safely walking down the hills. My quads were fairly shot as I came into the Lodge at the end of loop 1. I did the loop in 6 hours, which wasn't too shabby, but I was hoping for 5. I decided to have a serious think about the rest of the race. I ate some yogurt, drank some coconut water and rubbed the legs out. Ultimately, I knew I was done, but I wanted to give myself some more time. The longer I thought about it, the more I realized that I would probably be out on the trail in the dark and I wasn't sure about my ability to navigate the rock in daylight, never mind moonlight on exhausted legs. My light, gloves, pants, jacket, were all dispersed at different drop bags along the course and I was fairly certain I would need it all sooner rather than later.
I surmised that I would be risking a pretty nasty fall/injury since my lower extremities were pretty well fried after only one loops and did not want to give up the training time that I would certainly lose after this race that I need to complete Rocky. So I handed in my chip. Sure, I could have eeked out a few more miles, walking. But why? I packed up my gear and headed home, tail between my legs. Cactus Rose's thorns got me good.

What Went Right; Went Went Not-so Right

My gear was in check for the race. I had no issues to speak of. I was warm when I needed to be and able to shed layers as necessary. My hydration was spot on. I was drinking regularly and had no feelings of dehydration or stomach upset. I probably could have eaten more frequently, but I really never felt hungry. I ate a little bit every 5 miles, a few honey chews, a bit of a Larabar, and S-caps kept me topped off pretty well.

I think my training for this race as it pertains to mileage was good. The thing most lacking was the ability to train terrain-specific. I am not sure yet how I will accomplish this in the future. I understand that many runners actually run the course a few times during training, but I did not have that luxury this time around. Keeping this in mind, I may alter which races I register for in the future. If I can't duplicate the course terrain, I will need to analyze whether or not I am setting myself for a DNF.

Lessons To Go Home With -

Coming home from Cactus Rose, I had a good 4 or 5 hours to beat myself up. This is just part of the experience for me, I suppose. I need to work through the feelings that I have let others down, that I have failed at my goal, and finally that what I need to learn from it all.

This race was particularly difficult to DNF. I told myself and Mark that I would not DNF under any circumstance, unless there was a physical injury that prevented me from finishing. The lesson I take away from that line of thinking is that I have no business predicting the future. I can't possibly know what will happen out there nor why it will happen. Even in the best of situations things happen.

By the time I was about half-way home, I had retired from my ultra-running career, decided that I would only run for a few miles each week and take up crochet. It was pitiful. I had a good ole pity party, crowning myself queen of all that sucks.

A little further along, I decided maybe I just needed to be more careful in the races I decide to take on and train more specific to the courses I chose to run. If I can't run on a similar terrain, than perhaps I should not run the race.

I told a few people about my DNF and began to come out of my pity party the closer I got to home. I had to pull over for a brief nap as I was nodding off at the wheel. After about an hour of sleep, I felt much better, got my head on straight and heard God's whisper... "Running is what you do, it is not who you are." I prayed about this for a bit and asked myself some questions. Particularly these, "If I never raced again, would I be ok?" Answer... "Absolutely." "If I ran three days a week a few miles a day, would I be ok?" Answer..."Definitely." Running is NOT who I am. Running is what I enjoy. I AM a Mom. I AM a Nana. I AM a friend. I AM a Wife. I AM a sister. I AM a daughter. I AM a believer.

Now the toughest question of all, do I do what I enjoy because of selfish motivation or do I do what I enjoy because I am embracing the gift that He has given me? Do I glorify Him in this?

I am the type of person who needs to see God's hand in all that I can. I can sit and dwell upon why I didn't finish this race and what I need to do to finish it next year, and there certainly will be times when I do that, but for now, I need to see God's hand in the day I was given last Saturday. I ran one of the toughest courses I've ever run. It was one of the hardest runs I have been on. I finished a 25 mile training run in 6 hours and during that time, I was at the crest of a hill at sunrise. I saw God's handiwork in the hills of Bandera. It was worth everything to have been witness to that. It was a gift that many will never see. It is a gift that I will always cherish. My prayer is that I never forget what a blessing this experience was.

Finding Respite in Lost Maples

2010-10-25T11:20:00.000-07:00

We escaped the urban life this past weekend and headed to Garner State Park. We absolutely love it there! While there, we also ventured over to see Lost Maples again, this time, with a camera. The leaves are about 10 days away from being in their peak brilliance. I will be back in the area next weekend, and if there is time, I will try to see if I can sneak a brief trip in to see them again.

The time away was exactly what was needed. I didn't miss anything electronic. I was ecstatic to see that my phone still doesn't receive service out there. I hope it never does. I saw many people with their phones working, their lap tops out, ipads humming, etc. I was happy to leave all of that behind for a bit. I read a line from Thoreau the night before our trip. It resonated with me all weekend even into today.

"Our life is frittered away by detail...simplify, simplify, simplify."

I am working to continue to simplify, to strive to live in the moment, and to cherish the memories made within my real-time relationships. The rest of it doesn't seem so important anymore.

The First Step

2010-10-15T13:32:00.001-07:00

After much hemming and hawing, praying, discerning, questioning, checking, double checking, triple checking, changing my mind back and forth, back and forth, back and...well, you get the idea... I took the first step.

I registered. Rocky Raccoon 100. February 5, 2011. And the madness has just begun.

Busy and Busier

2010-10-11T18:09:00.000-07:00

This week will probably be one of the busiest I have had in many a moon. The real challenge will be getting in the mileage for the week as this is the last "big" mileage week before I begin my "taper" of sorts for Cactus Rose.

I lost 10 miles last weekend whilst tending to my lovely grand daughter. Something I didn't mind at all! How can I when she is as cute as can be!

Our Lady of the Rosary

2010-10-07T10:27:00.000-07:00

Today is the beautiful feast of Our Lady of the Rosary. Only a few years ago, that would not have made an impression upon me because I really didn't pray the Rosary unless someone started one and it would appear rude for me to exit the scene. I know, not very classy, but it is truth.

Over the last several years, I have gained a new found respect and love for this beautiful expression of prayer. Perhaps it was through working closely with the teens in LifeTeen and hearing about how the Rosary changed their lives or brought them closer to Christ. Perhaps it was listening to our youth minister describe his experience of praying a certain mystery while having a sort of metaphysical experience placing himself within the scene of a particular aspect of the mystery that converted my heart.

Whatever it was, it worked and I am forever grateful. It has changed my prayer life, my heart, my focus for my life and my family. It has opened my heart to a deeper level of Marian Devotion and though I am new to it all, I can see how drawing closer to the Blessed Mother is really drawing closer to Christ.

It is through the praying of the mysteries of the Rosary that I am able to place myself into the role of mother. Trying to imagine being Mary, looking for my Son who was left behind at the Temple. Or as a mother watching her Son being mocked, beaten, and eventually crucified. As the mother holding her newborn Son for the first time. Bringing Him to the priests to be consecrated to God. All of these experiences do not focus on Mary, rather, they bring the very real human emotion into the scene. I can experience the love, the pain, the sacrifice in a truer sense because I can relate to the occurrence as a mom.

I am currently reading True Devotion to Mary. It is a bit over my head most of the time, but I am beginning to comprehend the message within the text. Love of Our Lady does not take away from the love we have for her Son. It only magnifies it. Christ gave us His mother as He died on the cross. She was the first Disciple of Christ. She was the one who knew how to love Him perfectly. How can we not learn from her example.

I invite you to delve into the Rosary. Start with one decade a day. Take baby steps. Allow the love of Mary to move your heart and guide your soul towards her Son.

Making the Switch

2010-10-06T08:13:00.000-07:00

My objective for the last several weeks has been to transition over to morning runs. With the school year in full swing, our evenings are being quickly swallowed up by a variety of activities all of which leave little time for running and other forms of training.

I am a reluctant morning runner and have fought this change off for as long as possible, but it could no longer be avoided. So, I've begun my morning runs again, and they are not too bad! I guess what I dislike most about the morning time slot is the cold start to the day. I am not a cold weather person, not even a little bit.

Cold and sunny is acceptable, but cold and dark makes me want to curl up under the covers and rethink the whole running thing. You'd never know I was born a Yankee!

I don't look forward to running on those soon-to-be-here winter mornings. I think I officially am a Texas girl now. Not sure what to do when I get home and my running gear isn't soaking wet with sweat. Makes me feel like I haven't worked hard enough!

Training is going well. My base mileage has managed to creep up to a comfortable 50 miles/week. I find this amazing still. I distinctly remember not being able to run around the blocks just four years ago. I recall the first time I finished running an entire mile without walking. I stopped and cried for joy! I never, ever, ever, in my wildest dreams, ever thought I would run for exercise, and to see what my body can do now is quite surprising.

The most difficult aspect of training is the strengthening I am doing outside of running. Core, arms, push-ups,etc. I just don't like doing it. But, it is necessary to support the goals I have for my running. I've had to change my attitude towards this training. And there is one person in particular that has helped me to do this. Abi Meadows. Mom of 7. The most incredible abs I have ever seen. And I want them. Yep, I covet them. Hope that this only inspires me to stay true to my training and doesn't put me in violation of the 10th Commandment!

Cactus Rose is right around the corner. I am hoping to do well in this race, not merely finish it. This will be a great challenge for me. The way my training has been this year, I should be able to do well, as long as I don't let the mental game get in my way.

New Paths

2010-10-01T13:13:00.000-07:00

Last night, I ventured into a new type of run which will from now on be affectionately known as the UGH run.
UGH because that was all I could mutter out of my mouth by the time I had reached the top floor for the tenth time, and UG because, well, it wasn't the prettiest run I've ever been on so this run helps put the UG in UGLY!

Because I live in a fairly hill-barren area of Texas, hill training, unless you have access to a treadmill, is difficult to attain without weekend trips away to the Hill Country. Obligations to family and church tend to keep me close to home for most of my training, yet I understand the importance of hill training if I am planning to run anything hillier than Rocky Raccoon.

Several seasoned ultrarunners have recommended parking garage workouts, lunges, and stairclimber workouts. I had not yet attempted the parking garage, so last night became the night.

It was a nice 4.5 mile run to the college campus. I do believe I had a red and white bullseye mark painted on my shirt as it appeared that the drivers along 242 sped up with each attempt to cross the highway. I was happy to find a much safer route home which I'm sure was much to the dismay of the blood-thirsty urban hunters.

The stair well run was not one that will ever be listed as a top ten experience, but I am hopeful that if I can commit to completing these runs, the benefits will be forthcoming at Cactus Rose.

I was half-expecting the security guard to ask me to leave the property, but he never did. I am thankful for that because of all the parking garages available to me to run, I feel this one is the safest. The stairs are clean as they are brand new. The campus police station is housed within the parking garage. The stair well is completely open with very few blind spots in which a character of ill-will might decide to hide. I honestly do not know who in their right mind would approach me after a few miles of running, though. The stench is fairly unbearable.

I am still going to continue with the lunges, as they seem to provide the most level of pain on any given day. I have increased my weights while performing them and I am feeling the effects in all the right places.

What I am lacking most of all right now is my core and UE strengthening. I am consistently inconsistent, completing the routines approximately once a week. This is not going to serve me well. If I could get it in twice, I would feel much stronger and much more prepared for the race.

I do feel generally stronger overall right now. My running is strong, not fast, but strong. My legs are definitely stronger than they have ever been, but legs are not what is going to keep me upright in the late miles of the 50/100.

I seem to have been able to fix the problems with my iron levels. I am trying to take in more calories to keep my energy up as well. I remain vegan MOST of the time. I have had salmon twice in the last 4 weeks. I find that the fish is nice, but honestly, it seems too greasy to me now.

Running alone has become the predominant occurrence of late. I love when I am able to meet up with a friend to run, especially on a long run. This is not always possible though, so for the good of training, I run alone if needed.

Looking forward to the fall season of running. The long hot summer is hopefully behind us and all of those runs in the grueling heat will give way to pleasant runs in low humidity and welcome cooler temperatures.

Found this quote today to pass along to a friend who will be running her first 100 this weekend in Arkansas. Thought it might be a good point to ponder for the weekend!

"What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything?"
- Vincent van Gogh

So get out and make your own new paths this weekend! Happy Trails!

Happy Birthday, Mom!

2010-09-29T08:01:00.000-07:00

Even though Mom has been born into eternal life, I still like to take the time to remember her on this day above all days.

Though she is always in my thoughts and prayers, today reminds me of her strength. A strength I hope to attain one day. The sparkle in her eyes and the smile on her face was there for those who needed it most, the sick, the struggling, the hurt, the lonely.

Thank you for showing me how to love unconditionally, Mom. On this Feast of the Archangels, I pray that you are happily sitting at the feet of Jesus and watching your children, grandchildren, and great-grandchild grow into the sort of people you would be proud of.

I love you, Mom.

Grass Stains

2010-09-27T07:31:00.000-07:00

In my last post, I mentioned how many "grass stains" I might have avoided if I had stayed on the sidewalk. My mind has been wrestling this a bit this past week and while I still believe that God provides us the choice to walk a path of little resistance, I also believe that He loves us right where we are, no matter what grass stains we have picked up along the way and to top it all off, He brings the best blessings from our biggest stains.

There are several stains that I know I would never give back if given the opportunity. These are the ones that I have learned the most from and have ultimately helped me to grow closer to Him. These are the ones that have helped me to understand the perspective of someone else going through a similar situation and allow me to be more compassionate and accepting than I might have otherwise been.

Of course there are those "stains" I would love to give back. Probably the ones that show my selfishness, my self-centeredness, my lack of humility, my lack of patience and understanding. My ability to judge others with a horribly critical slant. The list goes on and on. But all is not lost. I trust in His mercy and His forgiveness and I know that He will provide me more opportunities to move past these flaws into actions that are more loving.

Once I learn to embrace life's challenges with grace on a consistent basis, from the little annoyances such as a longer-than-enjoyable-grocery checkout line, to the larger ones such as broken air conditioners, illnesses, financial uncertainty, and more, I am assured that peace will abound in my life and the lives of those I love most.

Have no anxiety at all, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God.
: Then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Phil 4:6-7

Staying on the Sidewalk

2010-09-22T11:47:00.000-07:00

Twice a week, I am at the local community college with my eldest son as he attends a dual credit class there. He is under the age of 16, so I must be on campus in order for him to be able to attend the class.

Thankfully, for him, I do not have to sit in the class itself, merely be on campus. Believe me, he breathed a huge sigh of relief on that one!

What this affords me is about 3 hours a week that I can head to the campus library and just soak up the quiet. I typically perform highly exciting activities such as balancing my check book, grading papers, or wasting time on fb.

Lately, I have noticed a young lady, a student here, who comes into the library to wait for a ride home. She happens to be blind and while some may find it awkward and unusual, I don't mind admitting that I stare at her the whole time she is there. OK, stare isn't a "nice" word, so let's just say, I observe her. That sounds better, doesn't it?

As I am observing her, I am intrigued at how well she gets around the place. She uses a walking cane and is completely independent from any assistance. Perhaps it is the OT in me that finds this amazing, but I do. I love to watch how the human mind can adapt to most any given situation. She is able to maneuver around everything in her way and while it may take it just a bit longer to get where she is going, she gets there and on her own power.

This past Monday, I was enjoying a cup of joe outside the library and had the opportunity to watch her exit the building. Her ride must have come and she was heading to the parking lot to be driven home. It was quite an incredible event to watch, er, I mean observe, her as she made her way down the sidewalks the entire way to the parking lot. Using her cane as her guide, she was able to discover where the twists and turns were in the concrete pathways. She came dangerously close to the edges of the sidewalks, to the point where a few times, I thought she was going to fall into the grass. She did not. Not even one time did she step off of the sidewalk. She made several turns and even one turn that was actually a fork in the path complete with a huge metal light pole in the middle of the fork. Without hesitation, and with her cane as her lead, she stepped with complete confidence in the direction she has memorized in her mind that will bring her to her destination.

All of this observation has left me something to ponder this week, and I thought I would share it here. I am much like this beautiful blind young woman, with one exception. I can see. But sometimes I wonder if that isn't the true disability. This young lady was so confident, so sure of her path, and she did not question her steps as she made her way to the parking lot. Why is that? It is because she trust what she knows. She can't rely on what she thinks she sees coming at her. She doesn't have that ability. But she can trust what she knows. The cane doesn't lie. The map in her mind doesn't change. And if she remains focused on her destination she will arrive safely and soundly.

I wonder how many times I have fallen off the sidewalk of my life because of what I thought I had seen coming towards me. I wonder, if I had just trusted God as this young lady trusted her cane, knowing that He will never betray me, how many grass stains I could have avoided.

I do believe that everything happens for a reason, and that He can draw the best things from even the darkest of moments, but in order for that to happen, I must cooperate with Him and trust Him. Much like the young lady with the walking cane.

He calls us to pick up our crosses and walk with Him. He promises that His yoke is light. Can I believe this, always? I pray that I can and stay on the sidewalk.